高考英语情景作文分析.pptx

,*,单击此处编辑母版标题样式,单击此处编辑母版文本样式,第二级,第三级,第四级,第五级,情 景 作 文,1/64,英语书面表示判卷标准,年、年评分标准均为：,1.,以关键点内容定档次。,2.,以语言质量定分数。,2/64,给分档次,一档文：（18-20分）,二档文：（15-17分）,三档文：（12-14分）,四档文：（6-11分）,五档文：（1-5 分）,六档文：（0 分）,注：情景,作文字数少于60,扣分。,情景作文,3/64,评卷给分细节要求,1.,阅卷中不要经过找单词去找关键点，一定要从,上下文来找关键点,。,2.阅卷,重点,放在用,完整、准确句子,去表示思想上，满篇没有正确句,子，一样打0分。,3.全部,关键点齐,全进,三档,（,12分以上），,要确保关键点和细节相互支撑。,4.,少一个细节进三档上线（14分），,能够视其语言情况+1或-1分,（说明该学生最高可得15分，最低可得13分）。,5.,少两个细节进三档下线（12分），,能够视其语言情况+1或-1分（说明该,学生最高可得13分，最低得11分）。,6.行文中图先后,次序有误或人称错误,直接进,四档,（6-11分）。,7.文章不能以投放垃圾作为结束，要加上一个,合情合理结尾，不然要,在所得分数中扣-1分。,8.,一档或二档文,确实定要依文章上下文,连贯、紧凑,，以及,语言质量,来决,定。,9.,关键点和细节可出现在一句话中,。,10.写落款、题目或称呼都忽略不计，按照正常情况给分。,情景作文,4/64,假设你是红星中学高三一班学生李华，为校刊英语园地写一篇题为“Our Spring Outing”英文稿件。请依据以下四幅图先后次序，叙述上周你们班从准备春游到春游结束完整过程。,注意：词数不少于60。,提醒词：游乐园 amusement park,垃圾箱 bin,情景作文,5/64,假设,你是,红星中学,高三一班学生,李华，为校刊英语园地写一篇题为“Our Spring Outing”英文稿件。请依据以下四幅图,先后次序,，叙述,上周,你们班从准备,春游,到春游结束完整过程。,注意：词数不少于60。,提醒词：游乐园 amusement park,垃圾箱 bin,6/64,情景作文,7/64,内容关键点及细节,1.关键点,：,讨论,细节：,去游乐园,划船,爬山,决定去爬山,情景作文,8/64,关键点,：讨论have a heated discussion about whetherdiscuss whetherthere is a heated discussion about whether,9/64,细节：,去游乐园,go to amusement park,划船,go boating,爬山 go mountain-climbing,决定去爬山decide to(go mountain-climbing),10/64,Last week we had,a heated discussion about whether we should go,Spring Outing,There was a heated discussion about whether we should go Spring outing.,11/64,Last week,our class had a spring outing,which the whole class think was quite meaningful.,12/64,Last week,there was a heated discussion on where to go for our spring outing.Some students wanted to go to amusement park,some considered to go boating and others gave their ideas for climbing.Eventually,we decided to take a climb.,13/64,Last week our class organized a spring outing.To make this memorable activity more wonderful,we discussed the destination carefully and finally decided to go mountain-climbing instead of other choices like playing in an amusement park and going boating,14/64,内容关键点及细节,2.,关键点,：,爬山,细节：,携带吃、喝,天气,风景,进行竞赛-,看谁先到山顶,情景作文,15/64,关键点,：,爬山go mountain-climbing climb the mountaingo hikinggo climbing the mountain,16/64,细节：,携带吃、喝with food and drink,on their back,天气,a shiny day a fine day a nice day a,sunny,day,the warm sunshine,17/64,风景,flowers trees,a beautiful scenery,a beautiful view a beautiful sight,18/64,进行竞赛-看谁先到山顶pete with each other in climbing the mountain for be in competition with each other for hold a mountain climbing competition2.reach the top of the mountain,19/64,内容关键点及细节,3.,关键点：,捡拾垃圾（可捡拾自己也可捡拾他人）,细节：,一路走，一路捡，要有对场面描写,情景作文,20/64,3.,关键点,：,捡拾垃圾（可捡拾自己也可捡拾他人）,pick up the rubbish,collect the rubbishgather the rubbish,21/64,细节,：,一路走，一路捡，pick the rubbish as/while walk要有对场面描写1.,Wasted bottles and used packages were thrown everywhere,2.,we were shocked to see litter here and there,such as bottles and bananas peels.,22/64,内容关键点及细节,4.,关键点,：,投放垃圾,细节：,垃圾分类：可回收,和不可回收,情景作文,23/64,4.,关键点,：,投放垃圾,1.put the rubbish into the bin 2.throw the rubbish into the dustbin 3.drop the rubbish into the dustbin,24/64,细节,：,垃圾分类：可回收和不可回收,1.,divide/classify them into two groups：recycle ones and the,non-recycle ones.,2.,put the rubbish into the nearby recycling bin and non-recycling bin respectively(=separately)3.throw all the rubbish into the,proper,bins.,4.put the rubbish into the bin,differently,.,语言变通，思维活跃,25/64,Last week,the students in my class decided to go out for a spring outing.Some of us wanted to go to the amusement park.Some wanted to go boating and some wanted to climb the mountain.Finally we decided to climb the mountain.,I was a shiny day.All of us were happy.But when we reached the top of the mountain.We found that rubbish everywhere!We picked the rubbish and threw them into the dustbin.,I think,we shouldnt threw the rubbish everywhere and we should do our best to protect the environment.The more we do,the more beautiful the earth will be!,情景作文,第二幅图少关键点,第四图少细节,语言表述缺乏准确性和逻辑性，影响了对所写内容了解。,9分,26/64,Last week our Class1 Senior 3 in Red Star High school had an unusual spring outing.,The day before we left,our classmates had a heated discussion about the destination of the outing.Some students suggested the amusement park,while others preferred boating and mountain climbing.When it came to practice,we were having a good time climbing at last.However,at the top of the mountain,we were angry rather than shocked to find out that loads of rubbish were discovered everywhere.Meanwhile,it came to our mind that we had to clean this mess up.Thus,after recycling the rubbish in different bins,we were all very cheerful that we not only returned the beauty back to the mountain,but also had a wonderful spring outing.,遗漏了第二幅图这个关键点，只能进四档，但其语言很好故+1分，总分为,12,。,情景作文,27/64,Last week,our class had a spring outing,which the whole class think was quite meaningful.,When getting prepared for the activity,we had a heated discussion about where to go.Opinions divided among the students.Some students suggested we go to the amusement park to get relaxed,while others recommended that we go boating.Finally,most of the students agreed to go hiking.On a sunny day,my class gathered at the foot of the mountain,and everyone looked so exited.While hiking in the mountain,we all had a happy smile.But when reaching the top of the mountain,we are so surprised to find that lots of rubbish was left there.Then we decided to collect them with the bags we bought.Everyone spared no effort to do a good job.At last,when we got down the mountain,we threw all the rubbish into the proper bins.,How meaningful was our spring outing!,情景作文,覆盖了全部内容关键点，但有个别细节缺失，全文行文流畅，内容连贯，有少许错误。,14分,28/64,Last week,there was a heated discussion on where to go for our spring outing.Some students wanted to go to amusement park,some considered to go boating and others gave their ideas for climbing.Eventually,we decided to take a climb.,The next day,all of us prepared well.With our enjoyment,each of us climbed the mountain full of energy.However,when we got to the top of the mountain,what covered our eyes first was the mass of rubbish.It was really a pity that the rubbish destroyed a beautiful scenery.At last,we made up our mind to pick up the rubbish.After a while,with everyones effort,the rubbish was cleared off immediately and we put them into the recycled and unrecycled bins.,In my eyes,this spring outing not only gave us lots of pleasure,but also gave us a meaningful lesson.Only to protect our environment,can we get a beautiful society.Therefore,I hope everyone can join us to make our home clean and tidy.,情景作文,覆盖了全部内容关键点，语法和用词能够满足任务要求，篇章较为连贯，有少许语言错误。,16分,29/64,Last week our class organized a spring outing.To make this memorable activity more wonderful,we discussed the destination carefully and finally decided to go mountain-climbing instead of other choices like playing in an amusement park and going boating.,With high spirits,we started our spring outing on a fine day.Flowers presented us with their sweetest smiles and we were soaked up in the warm sunshine.However,we were shocked when we reached the top of the mountain.Wasted bottles and used packages were thrown everywhere which totally ruined the beauty of the nature.Feeling a great pity for the tourists,we picked up the rubbish and carefully divided them into two groups：recycle ones and the non-recycle ones.After that,we put the rubbish into the bin differently.,We call on awareness on protecting our environment which is of great importance.Though clearing up the rubbish was a tough task,our hearts were filled with joy and we will remember this outing for ever.,内容关键点齐全，描述语句丰富，上下文连贯，有效地使用了语句间链接成份，只有个别用词错误，表达了较强语言利用能力。,19分,情景作文,30/64,In the last week,teacher tell us“we will be go to spring amusement”we were very happy students thinks we will go to park.It has mouter,hill,river,boat and so on.We were asked on noon.,The last is come on!Tomorrow,teacher and us gone to amusement park,we were played very happy we were gone there that we were went to go to!Monter.Hill,river,boat.In the noon,we were have food,we all kinds of food,We are very like then.In the afternoon.We will go out come back we were out had food go to the bin.We were very happy come back.,0分,情景作文,31/64,Possible version,Last Thursday,we had a class meeting to discuss where to go for our spring outing.We came up with several choices,such as going boating,climbing a mountain,and going to an amusement park.Finally we decided to go mountain climbing.,The next day,we set off early in the morning,while climbing the mountain,we enjoyed the warm sunshine and a beautiful view.However,when we reached the top,we were shocked to see litter here and there,such as bottles and bananas peels.Then we started to pick up the litter.Afterwards,we put the rubbish into the nearby recycling bin and non-recycling bin respectively.,We were tired but happy.,32/64,情景作文出现主要问题,1.审题不仔细，遗漏关键点。,2.缺乏细节观念，不能使文章衔接紧密。,3.人称和时态观念差，文章直接降档。,4.语言基本功差，漏洞百出。,5.缺乏交际观念，极难出众地完成写作任务。,情景作文,33/64,总复习看图类作文,P210(1),34/64,Picture 1,关键点：,1.,pay/make a visit to China,2.be on a visit to China3.have a trip to China4.go on a visit to,35/64,细节,(难),go to the Great Wall got on the taxi talk with me a long way from get thereclimb the Great Wall,36/64,Picture 2,关键点：,lose,my purse,37/64,细节：,look for the purse wonder where.be worried leave it on the taxi,38/64,Picture 3,关键点:,telephone the taxi company,39/64,细节,(难),1.,receive the call2.check my name and everything in my purse3.leave the purse on the fort me(turn it in;send it to),40/64,Picture 4,关键点：感激,thank you for,41/64,细节：,Not at all.be movedbe touched,feel happy,42/64,I have just paid a visit to China.When I got there,what impressed me most was,not only,the beautiful scenery,but also,the honest people.I went to the Great Wall one day by taxi.,Hardly had I got on the taxi when the driver started talking with me in English.,It was a long way from the city of Beijing and It took me about one hour to arrive there.,I was so amazed at seeing it that I couldnt help starting to climb it,forgetting almost everything.I lost myself in such a wonderful Wall.,43/64,In the afternoon,I was about to go back to my hotel when I found that my purse was lost.,I was worried and looked for it here and there,but I couldnt find it.Suddenly I remembered I had left it on the taxi.,44/64,With the help of a warm-hearted man,I immediately telephoned the taxi company.The man/clerk/staff(who received the call)checked my name and everything.,He comforted me,saying that the driver had turned it in and that he would have it sent to my hotel as soon as possible.,45/64,When I got back my purse,I was so touched that I thanked the clerk very much.,I have had such a wonderful time there that I will never forget my experience in China.,写文章一定要有结尾,46/64,08 西城抽样4 月一模,47/64,Picture 1,关键点,：,gather/meet at the school gate and set out by bile,48/64,细节：,1.With a camera,notebooks and bottles of water in our backpacks,2.场面描写be happy,49/64,Picture 2,关键点,：,search for mistakes/mistranslated or incorrectly spelt English on street signs,50/64,细节:,1.took pictures of,2.took notes of the signs,3.场面描写A busy,but delightful morning,51/64,Picture 3,关键点,：,discuss and check/correct,52/64,细节,(难),1.write the wrong sentences on the blackboard(present all the mistakes in class)2.,comp up with the correct translation,3.With the help of our English teacher 4.put the incorrect sentences into the correct ones,53/64,Picture 4,关键点:,tell the editors about what we have found(our findings).,54/64,细节:,1.write to the newspaper,2.hope our effort will be of some help to the Beijing Olympics.(回到主题),注意：要有结尾,55/64,Dear Peter,How are things going?We have been busy preparing for the coming Olympics recently.Last Sunday we had an activity-to search for mistranslated or incorrectly spelt English on street signs.Early in the morning my classmates and I gathered at the school gate.With a camera,notebooks and bottles of water in our backpacks,we soon set out on our detective trip by bike.,No sooner had we reached our destination than we began to devote ourselves to working.,In the street,some of us took pictures while others took notes of the signs we thought were wrong or questionable.A busy,but delightful morning soon passed.,56/64,In the English class next morning,we presented in class all the mistakes collected including“Wellcome to Beijing”and“Take Notice of Safe”.,With the help of our English teacher we had a heated discussion about where the mistakes lie in and finally we came to a conclusion that the correct translation should be like“Welcome to Beijing”and“Caution!”,etc.,Then we wrote to the newspaper and told the editors about what we had found.We hope our effort will be of some help to the Beijing Olympics.We were tired but happy because we not only improved our English level but also made a little contribution to the Olympics.Yours,Li Hua,57/64,Dear Peter,How are things going?We have been busy preparing for the coming Olympics recently.Last Sunday we had an activity-to search for mistranslated or incorrectly spelt English on street signs.Early in the morning my classmates and I gathered at the school gate.With a camera,notebooks and bottles of water in our backpacks,we soon set out on our detective trip by bike.In the street,some of us took pictures while others took notes of the signs we thought were wrong or questionable.A busy,but delightful morning soon passed.In the English class next morning,we presented in class all the mistakes collected including“Wellcome to Beijing”and“Take Notice of Safe”.With the help of our English teacher we discussed and finally camp up with the correct translation-“Welcome to Beijing”and“Caution!”,etc.Then we wrote to the newspaper and told the editors about our findings.We hope our effort will be of some help to the Beijing Olympics.Yours Li Hua,58/64,Dear Peter,How are things going?We have been busy preparing for the coming Olympics recently.,Last Sunday we had an activity-to search for mistranslated or incorrectly spelt English on street signs.Early in the morning my classmates and I gathered at,the school gate.With a camera,notebooks and bottles of water in our backpacks,we soon set out on our detective trip by bike.No sooner had we reached our destination than we began to devote ourselves to working.,In the street,some of us took pictures while others took notes of the signs we,thought were wrong or questionable.A busy,but delightful morning soon passed.In the English class next morning,we presented in class all the mistakes collected including“Wellcome to Beijing”and“Take Notice of Safe”.With the help of our English teacher we had a heated discussion about where the mistakes lie in and finally we came to a conclusion that the correct translation should be like“Welcome to Beijing”and“Caution!”,etc.Then we wrote to the newspaper and told the editors about what we had found.We hope our effort will be of some help to the Beijing Olympics.Yours Li Hua,59/64,形成练习unit 6,60/64,I was having an English class when the earthquake,happened.As I was sitting near the door,I was able