如何判断你是个没劲的朋友.doc

· certify ['sə:tifai]
v. 证明；保证
· accumulate [ə'kju:mjuleit]
vi. 累积；积聚; vt. 积攒
· acknowledge [ək'nɔlidʒ]
vt. 承认；答谢；报偿；告知已收到
· occasionally [ə'keiʒənəli, əu-]
adv. 偶而，间或
· uncomfortable [,ʌn'kɔmfətəbl]
adj. 不舒服的；不安的
· embarrass [im'bærəs]
vt. 使局促不安；使困窘；阻碍
· scare [skεə]
vt. 惊吓；把…吓跑; vi. 受惊; n. ...
· circumstance ['sə:kəmstəns]
n. 环境，情况；事件；境遇
· diversion [dai'və:ʃən, di-]
n. 转移；消遣；分散注意力
· sake [seik]
n. 目的；利益；理由；日本米酒

How To Tell You're Becoming The Lame Friend
发布时间：2013-01-05
文章出自：
原文链接：点击查看

Your friends call you to go out and you don’t even look at your phone. It’s not that you don’t like them, it’s just that even to acknowledge the things they’re saying would make you feel guilty and uncomfortable. You’d rather listen to the sound of your vibrating phone and wait until it’s over than see the words which have actually been written to you. You know what it’s going to say — “Hey, we’re all meeting up at the bar at nine, wanna come out?” No, you don’t want to go out, and you’re tired of explaining it.
It’s not that you’re sad. In fact, you’re happier than you’ve been in recent memory. You’re just not interested in doing things socially just for the sake of doing them. You like being by yourself, or maybe inviting a friend over for a movie, and getting to bed at a reasonable hour. And you know that announcing your desire to go to sleep would result in a million cries of “Oh, come on, don’t be so lame.” The thing is, you’re not sure if you’re lame or not by wanting to go to sleep early and not get drunk. You very well might be, but no amount of embarrassment is going to get you out of your apartment.
You sometimes wonder about the things you’re missing, the people who are doing things without you, developing friendship and accumulating memories. The desire to join them occasionally wells up in you and spills over into actual social interaction — you join for a few drinks, you stay out for a while, you laugh with the jokes and catch up on the stories you’ve missed. And you can enjoy it. There’s nothing wrong with it. But the more pressing truth seems to be that you’ve grown out of something which you cannot quite identify. You love seeing everyone, you love learning new things, but you may not experience it in the same way you once did.
Your stamina, your ability to get wasted and consider it a real diversion, your desire to meet people in embarrassing circumstances which you might not remember the next morning, are all waning as you decide that you want to construct things during the day. You’ve always been told that maturing into a time when partying is no longer your go-to activity makes you something of a boring person, a certified adult — but you can no longer force yourself to be interested in the same things as all your other friends.
Sometimes you worry about what it would mean to be the “lame” one, to no longer be the last to leave a party or even be interested in meeting at the bar. You get frustrated at the automatic division amongst a group of people as “cool” or “no longer cool, ” strictly judged on how much alcohol you intake or how long you stay out at night. You have moments of seeing yourself older and no longer fun, long-since slipped into a routine of a bit of television before bed, but you aren’t as scared of it as you are of being a person you’re no longer interested in being just to please everyone else. You’d rather ignore your phone, you’ve decided, than go along with a group who isn’t interested in finding a pleasant middle-ground.
You know that they’re probably saying something about you. They’re saying that you’re not as fun as you used to be, that you don’t know how to party, that you’re always at home. And though the feeling of being talked about behind one’s back is never pleasant, you at least know that it’s true. You’re the “lame friend, ” and that’s okay with you.
如何判断你是个没劲的朋友
发布时间：2013-01-05
文章出自：译言
原文链接：点击查看
    你的朋友打给你约你出去，你竟然不听电话。不是说你不喜欢他们，只是当你知道他们要说的东西会让你不舒服，而情愿去让你震动的手机一直震动直到停止，你情愿去看短信上他们发了什么给你。你知道说的是什么“嘿，我们今晚九点在酒吧见面，你来吗？”不，你不想去并且懒得解释。
    这并不意味着你正在处于忧伤中。事实上，你比起从前记忆的要开心。你只是对做这件事情不感兴趣。你喜欢做自己，或者邀请朋友来看的电影，早些睡觉。你知道当你宣布你要去睡觉的时候结果是换来百万个哀嚎“：哦，摆脱，不要这么没劲嘛。”你并不确定，你想早些睡觉不喝醉是不是真的很没劲。你可能的确是，但没有一丝一毫的尴尬让你想从你的公寓里出来。
    有时候你会想你错过的东西，没有你伙伴们一起做的事情，发展友谊和积累回忆。加入他们的想法涌现并变成了实际的社交行动——你加入并喝了几杯小酒，在酒吧待了一会儿，讲着笑话和一些之前错过的八卦新闻并且你发现你享受这一切。这并没什么错，但更迫切的事实看起来是你已经抛弃了一些你并不能确定东西。你喜欢与人见面，喜欢学新的事物，但你可能不会按从前的方式去做。
    你不想继续这样的生活，你的毅力也派不上用场，试想一个真实的转移，你的意愿去参加一个第二天早上就会忘记的派对正在减少，因为你那天有其他的事情想做。你总是被告知要变得成熟的时候是就当某天你不再觉得不去派对会让你觉得自己是无聊的成年人-但你没办法逼迫你自己去像你其他的朋友一样对一样的事情感兴趣。
    有时候你会担心你变得没劲，你不再成为最后一个人离开派对甚至你不再想在酒吧见面。你厌倦这种以今晚喝了多少酒和晚上在外面呆多久来区分"酷”和“不再酷”的人。有一瞬间你感觉自己老了或不再年轻了，早就进入了看些电视然后睡觉的模式，但你并不恐惧你变成了不再取悦所有人的人。你已经宁愿不看手机而不是在圈子中寻找妥协。
    你知道他们可能会说你，他们会说你从前很有趣而你现在不知道如何派对，你老在家。虽然被人在背后说闲话不好受，你至少知道那个事实。那就是你就是一个“没劲”的朋友但你欣然接受。