大学英语6级有意思文章.doc

"HOW lovely you look, my dear!" gushed a wedding guest to the bride. And then she whispered, "Whatever happened to that dizzy blonde your groom used to date?" "I dyed my hair," replied the bride. "
你看起来多漂亮啊，亲爱的！"一位参加婚礼的客人向新娘发出赞叹。接着她又向新娘低语，"你的新郎过去常常约会的那个傻乎乎的金发女郎怎么着了？""我染了头发，"新娘回答道。
注释：西方有种传统偏见认为，漂亮的金发女郎总是又蠢又笨的，所以很多英语笑话都是拿金发女郎当话题。

"I found an appetite suppressant that really works. It's called food!"
“我发现了一个有效抑制食欲的方法。叫做食物！”

"If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do?" "Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 feet in the air and scatter oneself over a wide area."
“先生，我们万一踩上了地雷该做些什么？” “中尉，正常的程序是：你该向空中窜上200英尺，然后把自己播撒在某个广袤无边的地方。”

"I've got the test results back from your ear doctor. You're not hearing impaired, you're listening impaired."
“我从你耳科医生那得到检验报告，你不是听觉损伤，你是故意不听。”

"Moon, for what do you wait? "
"To salute the sun for whom I must make way." 一一Tagore
“月亮，你在等待什么？”
“我等着礼赞我得向他让路的太阳。” 一一泰戈尔

"My favorite picture was taken when I had thin thighs and a tiny waist. Actually, it was my sonogram."
“这是我照的最喜欢的照片，当时我有苗条的大腿，纤细的腰。事实上，那是我的超声波扫描图。”

"So", thundered Larry's furious father, "you've been expelled from college, have you?"
"Yes, Dad. I am a fugitive from a brain gang."
“这么说”，拉里暴怒的父亲大声呵斥道：“你已经被学校开除了，是吗？”
“是的，老爸。我是智慧帮的逃亡者。”
注释：I Am a Fugitive from a Chain Gang（《逃亡》）是美国一部经典电影。

"The whole keyboard isn't damaged, just the colon."
"I'm referring you to a proctologist."
“整个键盘并未受到损坏，只是这个冒号坏了。”
“我建议你去找结肠病学家。”
注释：colon即有冒号的意思，也有结肠的意思。

"To hear our message in English, press 1. For Spanish, press 2. For French, press 3. For Urban Slang, press 4. For Liberal Bias, press 5. For Conservative Spin, press 6 ."
“听取信息英语请按1，西班牙语请按2，法语请按3，城镇俚语请按4，自由党倾向的请按5，保守党特征的按6。”
注释：该句提示了一种现象：有不同政见的人就像说着不同的语言。

"We found a bunch of these clogging your arteries. They're cholesterol pills."
“我发现了一堆阻塞你血管的东西，它们是治疗胆固醇的药片。”

"What ails Alex?" asks Alice.
“亚历克斯为什么烦恼？”爱丽丝问道。（绕口令）

Genius means the transcendent capacity of taking trouble.
天才意味着承担麻烦的超强能力。

(Two guys and a gal in a tutorial with female tutor. The tutor is writing down a problem on the board)...Guy #1: "It's the same one from last week! "Guy #2: nods/agrees. Gal #1: does not understand...Guy #1: "It's rather short. "Guy #2: nods/agrees. Gal #1 intercepted: "She is writing three boards of solution and it's short? "Guys #1 & 2: "We're talking about her skirt."
（一位女家庭教师在辅导两个男孩和一个女孩。女老师在黑板上写下一个问题…）男孩1：“和上星期的一样！”男孩2点头同意。女孩1：不明白…男孩1：“很短。”男孩2：点头同意。女孩1打断：“她的答案写了三黑板，这还短？”男孩1 和 2：“我们说的是她的裙子。”

“If everybody minded their own business,” the Duchess said in a hoarse growl, “the world would go round a deal faster than it does.” ——Lewis Carroll, English author, mathematician. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, ch. 6.
“如果每个人管好自己的事情，”公爵夫人嘶哑着嗓子吼道，“地球就会比现在转得快好多。”
——刘易斯 卡洛尔 美国作家、数学家。选自《爱丽丝漫游仙境 》第6章。