大学英语6级有意思文章.doc

"HOW lovely you look, my dear!" gushed a wedding guest to the bride. And then she whispered, "Whatever happened to that dizzy blonde your groom used to date?" "I dyed my hair," replied the bride. "
你看起来多漂亮啊，亲爱的！"一位参加婚礼的客人向新娘发出赞叹。接着她又向新娘低语，"你的新郎过去常常约会的那个傻乎乎的金发女郎怎么着了？""我染了头发，"新娘回答道。
注释：西方有种传统偏见认为，漂亮的金发女郎总是又蠢又笨的，所以很多英语笑话都是拿金发女郎当话题。

"I found an appetite suppressant that really works. It's called food!"
“我发现了一个有效抑制食欲的方法。叫做食物！”

"If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do?" "Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 feet in the air and scatter oneself over a wide area."
“先生，我们万一踩上了地雷该做些什么？” “中尉，正常的程序是：你该向空中窜上200英尺，然后把自己播撒在某个广袤无边的地方。”

"I've got the test results back from your ear doctor. You're not hearing impaired, you're listening impaired."
“我从你耳科医生那得到检验报告，你不是听觉损伤，你是故意不听。”

"Moon, for what do you wait? "
"To salute the sun for whom I must make way." 一一Tagore
月亮，你在等待什么？”
“我等着礼赞我得向他让路的太阳。” 一一泰戈尔

"My favorite picture was taken when I had thin thighs and a tiny waist. Actually, it was my sonogram."
“这是我照的最喜欢的照片，当时我有苗条的大腿，纤细的腰。事实上，那是我的超声波扫描图。”

"So", thundered Larry's furious father, "you've been expelled from college, have you?"
"Yes, Dad. I am a fugitive from a brain gang."
“这么说”，拉里暴怒的父亲大声呵斥道：“你已经被学校开除了，是吗？”
“是的，老爸。我是智慧帮的逃亡者。”
注释：I Am a Fugitive from a Chain Gang（《逃亡》）是美国一部经典电影。

"The whole keyboard isn't damaged, just the colon."
"I'm referring you to a proctologist."
“整个键盘并未受到损坏，只是这个冒号坏了。”
“我建议你去找结肠病学家。”
注释：colon即有冒号的意思，也有结肠的意思

"To hear our message in English, press 1. For Spanish, press 2. For French, press 3. For Urban Slang, press 4. For Liberal Bias, press 5. For Conservative Spin, press 6 ."
“听取信息英语请按1，西班牙语请按2，法语请按3，城镇俚语请按4，自由党倾向的请按5，保守党特征的按6。”
注释：该句提示了一种现象：有不同政见的人就像说着不同的语言。

"We found a bunch of these clogging your arteries. They're cholesterol pills."
“我发现了一堆阻塞你血管的东西，它们是治疗胆固醇的药片。”

"What ails Alex?" asks Alice.
“亚历克斯为什么烦恼？”爱丽丝问道。（绕口令）

Genius means the transcendent capacity of taking trouble.
天才意味着承担麻烦的超强能力。

(Two guys and a gal in a tutorial with female tutor. The tutor is writing down a problem on the board)...Guy #1: "It's the same one from last week! "Guy #2: nods/agrees. Gal #1: does not understand...Guy #1: "It's rather short. "Guy #2: nods/agrees. Gal #1 intercepted: "She is writing three boards of solution and it's short? "Guys #1 & 2: "We're talking about her skirt."
（一位女家庭教师在辅导两个男孩和一个女孩。女老师在黑板上写下一个问题…）男孩1：“和上星期的一样！”男孩2点头同意。女孩1：不明白…男孩1：“很短。”男孩2：点头同意。女孩1打断：“她的答案写了三黑板，这还短？”男孩1 和 2：“我们说的是她的裙子。”

“If everybody minded their own business,” the Duchess said in a hoarse growl, “the world would go round a deal faster than it does.” ——Lewis Carroll, English author, mathematician. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, ch. 6.
“如果每个人管好自己的事情，”公爵夫人嘶哑着嗓子吼道，“地球就会比现在转得快好多。”
——刘易斯 卡洛尔 美国作家、数学家。选自《爱丽丝漫游仙境 》第6章。