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1 Introduction
The film “Scraping Therapy” reflects the difference of value and culture views between western society and orient society. China society has been receiving impact of Confucianism for thousands years. Confucianism is known as paying regard to human relationship and ethic. Piety, courtesy and localism are most important ethic. But in Western culture which is more emphasis on individualism, independence and equality. So conflicts in culture and value are unavoidable. These conflicts have shown in the story.
In Chinese culture, physical punishment is commonly used by Chinese family. They think this will help to growing up. But in western society it is absolutely forbidden. Any abusing children were viewed as illegal conduct. As to show respect to friends, Da Tong Xu punished his own son physically in front of friends. But this was misinterpreted as violence by his foreign friends. This is a misunderstanding in culture between East and West.
In this film, grandpa who had living in China for many years treated his grandson with a widespread treatment in Chinese folk named “Scraping Therapy”. This is a very ancient Chinese medicine therapy, and is handed down from one generation to another which has thousands of years of history in China. In the United States, this is an unfounded treatment. When the child gets sick, hospital is the only correct choice. Scraping Therapy in the story led to great conflict and misunderstanding. There are many other culture and value conflicts performed in the film, such as conflict between Chinese traditional culture and Western industrial civilization, conflict of the education of their children’s daily habits and so forth.
How to avoid the tragedy of the story? We must strengthen the East-West cultural exchange and learning, and only with respect to different cultures and inclusive will it be possible to avoid the culture and values of conflict.
2 Comparison of Chinese and American values based on the movie
Chinese and Americans possess different values about success. At the beginning of the movie, XU Da-tong is rewarded as the best designer of video games by the company. When he is requested to make a short speech, he mentions that he would especially extend thanks to his boss and all of his colleagues. This is a typical Chinese speech made after being successful. They attribute their success to other’s help and cooperation. It is what Chinese people usually do on that occasion. In China, relationship plays a critical role in people’s lives. Many Chinese people get ahead with the help of their family background and friends. Therefore, they are used to extending their gratitude to other people even though their success has little to do with some of them. They seldom say that they succeed because of their own ability and hard work. Nevertheless, Americans hold different values in this aspect. Americans are more likely to express pride in themselves and their accomplishment rather than to express pride in their group, company, family or hometown.
3 Family Education Conflict
3.1. Chinese Family Education View
In China, when children do something wrong, parents will scold and beat children as a punishment. Chinese family education is famous for strictness. There are Chinese old sayings can show the strictness, such as “to feed without teaching is the father’s fault”, “spare the rod, spoil the son”, just as the words Datong’s father said: “打是亲,骂是爱(to scold and to beat a naughty boy is due to love)”. It is also common for parents, especially parents in the rural areas, to leave their children alone at home, Chinese parents are always busy with their jobs or farming, and there is not enough time for them to take care of their children, so they have to leave their children at home. It is not surprising at all in the rural areas to find children lying on the floor with fly flying around them. Nowadays, with the popularization of the television, it is safer and more convenient for parents to leave children at home.
3.2 American Family Education View
In America, parents never hit their children for their mistakes .They do not think it will do any help to scold and beat them. It will be more useful to encourage them to stand up again than to scold and beat them, which will only discourage their confidence. And most importantly, it is illegal to beat children. In America, it is also illegal to leave their children alone at home.
3.3 The Reason for Their Different Views
The reason for the differences between Chinese parents and American parents is that they each have different role orientation. Chinese parents consider their children as their own property. They think the children are affiliated to them. The children can only grow up under their control. Most of the Chinese parents play the role of arranging children’s fate. This kind of relationship is obviously unfair. However, American parents regard their children as free and independent individuals since their children are born. They put their children in an equal position. They pay much attention to the equal communication and respect children’s ideas and needs. In the process of their children’s growth, they give them guidance and help.1 Hence, Chinese parents have rights to scold and beat the children when they do something wrong and to leave them alone at home, while it is illegal to do such things in America.
3.4 Family Education Conflict Reflected in Gua Sha
In Gua Sha, Datong’s son Denis hit his friend Kunlan’s son Paul, Datong asks Denis to apologize to Paul, but Denis refuses to say sorry to Paul, then Datong hit Denis on the face in front of the public. In Chinese eye, it is perfectly justified to do so because they think they do this for children’s good, and to hit children is to love them and to make them become a useful person. Chinese parents is always educating their own children first when they deal with the quarrel or fight among children, while American parents pay attention to the truth. That’s why Datong first asked Denis to apologize to Paul without finding who is wrong or right. However, in America, parents are just the children’s keepers. They can’t go too far scolding their children, let alone beat them. That’s why Datong’s friend Kunlan is startled when he sees Datong hit Denis on the face.
There is another typical plot can embody the different family education views of Chinese and American. When Datong’s father stays at the station, and Jane is at work, Datong has to leave Denis alone at home in order to pick his father home. When Datong is on his way to the police station, he calls Jane. Here is the conversation:
Jane: Datong, where are you? I called twice, and no answer.
Datong: I was at the police station.
Jane: What? What happened?
Datong: Dad has a…
Jane: Is he ok?
Datong: Yes, he’s met up with an emergency.
Jane: where is Denis? Is he with you?
Datong: He’s home, I mean he’s sleep.
Jane: You mean you left Denis at home all by himself?
Datong: Oh, Jesus! You called home.
Datong’s father: Datong, you are driving too fast. Isn’t it breaking the law?
Datong: Dad, I left Denis alone at home. I’ve already broken the law.
From the conversation, it is known that it is illegal to leave children at home.
3.4.1 Different Views of Interpersonal Relationship
Dealing with the interpersonal relationship, American culture pays attention to individualism, while Chinese culture pays attention to collectivism. The following statements by Ting-Toomey are very clear:
Individualism emphasizes the importance of individual identity over group identity, individual rights over group rights and individual needs over group needs, which gives priority to individual, advocates individual benefits and individual freedom. Americans think that everyone has the freedom to do everything he wants as long as what he does will not interrupt others’ benefit, and he will be responsible for what he does. In the contrast, collectivism attaches importance to “we” identity over the “I” identity, group rights over individual rights and in-group-oriented needs over individual want and desires. Collectivism promotes relational interdependence, in-group harmony, and in-group collaborative spirit.
Not harming collective benefit is the precondition of what one does and what one says. When Chinese deal with the relationship of individual benefit and collective benefit, they think more of collective benefit. Sometimes, they will try their best to realize collective benefit at the expense of individual benefit. Chinese are always required to follow rules docilely and repress themselves. This kind of self-repression makes American scholars think that Chinese culture as I-less culture. Chinese culture emphasizes the full devotion to the collectivity and ignores individuality, while American culture gives a limited devotion to the collectivity.
In Gua Sha, when Jane gave birth to Denis at the hospital, Datong did not accompany her at the hospital because he had a meeting at the company. This kind of choice is understandable in China, where collectivity outweighs individuality, but is unacceptable and unforgivable in American society. And this is not only the conflict between collectivism and individualism, but also the conflict in interpersonal relationship view.
3.4.2 Family Conflict Reflected in Gua Sha
Family is the most basic element and carrier in the Chinese culture. Chinese family stresses the love of family and the love of consanguinity. They think that dog doesn’t eat dog(虎毒不食子),so when the Children Welfare Bureau accuses Datong of child abuse, he thinks it incredible and ridiculous. He says to his wife Jane, “A father loves his son. That’s the way where it works. Why do I have to prove my love, make up speeches? What the hell are we doing, Jane? It’s turning upside down. Everything is turning upside down!” However, it is acceptable in America, which is a place pays more attention to the truth and evidence. Filial piety is also a very important virtue in Chinese family. In the movie, Datong lies to the judge that he is the one who does Gua Sha to Denis in order to protect his father who is the real one does Gua Sha to Denis. He thinks that if he tells the judge it is his father does Gua Sha to Denis, he sells his own father out, and then he will not be a filial son. However, Americans will never understand the concept of filial piety in Chinese culture.
3.4.3 Family Conflict Reflected in Gua Sha
In Gua Sha, Datong asks his friend as well as boss Kunlan to be his counsel in the hearing, while Kunlan is just a property right lawyer, who knows little about family law. Kunlan suggests Datong to find a professional family law lawyer, but Datong insists on asking him to be his counsel. The only reason is that Kunlan is his friend, and he trusts him. The following is the conversation between Datong and his friend Kunlan:
Kunlan: …Family law is a very special land. It’s short time to ask a continuous day of hearing so that you can get someone who is qualified.
Datong: John, you know how much I love Denis! You’re best lawyer I know and my best friend. I mean who is ready to help.
Kunlan: But I am just a property right lawyer, I knew little about family law.
Datong: Denis is my best creation. I have a property right over him, right? They made a mistake, and all that you should do is to point it out and I can take Denis home. I’m counting on you!
Take another example, in the second hearing, Kunlan tells the judge that Datong once hit Denis. Kunlan’s attestation lead the case to be taken over by the formal court, Datong is very angry and decides to quit the job, thinking that Kunlan’s behavior betrays friend. Look at the conversation between Datong and his friend as well as boss Kunlan:
Datong: I won’t talk to you!
Kunlan: I am so sorry. I’m trying to tell you. I couldn’t lie, they knew everything.
Datong: I don’t have the time and intonation to hear you to justify your action. I just want to get my son home and get my life back.
Kunlan: And that’s why more than ever you need this job!
Datong: I consider you as my friend, but you sold me out. How dare you expect me to work with you again?
Kunlan: I just told the truth
In China, loyalty to friends is very important, while Americans are more rational. They emphasize the truth and know exactly what they should do. In a word, Chinese friendship focuses on human feelings, American friendship focuses on truth and reason. 3家庭教育冲突
3.1。中国家庭教育观
在中国，当孩子做错事时，父母会责骂和殴打儿童作为一种惩罚。中国家庭教育严格而闻名。有中国老的说法可以显示的，如严格，“以无教学为食是父亲的过错”，“备用杆，破坏的儿子”，一样的话大同的父亲说：“打是亲，骂是爱（骂和殴打一个顽皮的男孩，是因为爱）“。它是在农村地区，也为父母，尤其是家长的共同子女单独留在家中，中国的父母总是忙于自己的工作或农业，并没有足够的时间对他们采取照顾子女，让他们有自己的孩子留在家中。这并不奇怪，在所有的农村地区发现孩子趴在地板上与他们周围的飞飞行。如今，随着电视的普及，它是留在家中的儿童和家长更方便，更安全。
3.2美国家庭教育观
在美国，父母从来没有打自己的孩子为自己的错误，他们不认为它会做任何帮助责骂和殴打他们。这将是有用的，以鼓励他们重新站立起来，而不是责骂和击败他们，这只会挫伤他们的信心。最重要的是，它是非法殴打儿童。在美国，它也是非法的子女单独留在家中。
3.3不同意见的原因
中国父母和美国父母之间的差异的原因是，他们每个人都有不同的角色定位。中国父母认为他们的孩子作为自己的财产。他们认为，孩子们都隶属于他们。孩子们只能在其控制下成长起来的。大多数中国家长安排孩子的命运中发挥的作用。这种关系显然是不公平的。然而，美国的家长视自由和独立的个体，他们的孩子，因为他们的孩子出生。他们把自己的孩子在一个平等的地位。他们十分注重平等沟通和尊重孩子的想法和需求。在子女的成长过程中，他们给他们的指导和help.1因此，中国的父母有权利责骂和殴打孩子，当他们做错事时，他们单独留在家中，而做这种事情是违法的美国。
3.4家庭教育的冲突反映在刮痧
在大同的儿子丹尼斯刮痧，打他的朋友Kunlan的儿子保罗，大同问丹尼斯保罗道歉，但丹尼斯拒绝保罗说对不起，然后在脸上大同打丹尼斯在公众面前。在中国的眼睛，这是完全有理由这样做，因为他们认为他们做孩子们的好，并打孩子是爱他们，使他们成为一个有用的人。中国的父母总是教育自己的孩子时首先处理儿童之间的争吵或斗争，而美国父母要注意的真相。这就是为什么大同第一问丹尼斯道歉没有发现谁是错误的或右的保罗。然而，在美国，父母是儿童的饲养。他们不能走得太远训斥自己的孩子，更遑论击败他们。这就是为什么大同的朋友Kunlan是一震，当他看到大同打脸丹尼斯。
有另一种典型的情节能体现中国和美国不同的家庭教育的意见。当大同的父亲留在车站，和简是在工作中，大同单独留在家中的丹尼斯为了接父亲回家。当大同派出所途中，他呼吁简。下面是对话：
简：大同，你在哪里？我叫了两次，并没有答案。
大同：我是在派出所。
简：什么？这是怎么回事？
大同：爸爸有一个... ...
简：是他确定的？
大同：是的，他遇到了紧急情况。
简：丹尼斯在哪里？他跟你吗？
大同：他的家，我的意思是，他的睡眠。
简：你的意思是你留在家里自己丹尼斯？
大同：哦，耶！你打电话回家。
大同的父亲：大同，你开得太快。是不是违法？
大同：爸爸，我丹尼斯独自留在家中。我已经触犯法律。
从谈话中，它是已知的，这是非法留在家中的儿童。
3.4.1不同意见的人际关系
处理人际关系，美国文化注重个人主义，而中国文化注重集体主义。廷Toomey的下面的语句是很清楚的：
个人主义强调个人身份的群体认同的重要性，主张个人权利的群体的权利和个人的需要群体的需求，优先考虑个人，个人利益和个人自由。美国人认为，每个人都有做的一切，他希望为他做什么，不会打断别人的利益，长期的自由，他将负责为他做什么。对比度，集体主义重视“我们”的身份对“我”的身份，对个人权利的群体的权利和个人的希望和愿望，在集团化的需求。集体主义促进相互依存的关系，在群体和谐，和团体协作精神。
不损害集体利益是什么的前提下，说什么。当中国处理个人利益和集体利益的关系，他们认为更多的集体利益。有时，他们会尽力实现集体利益牺牲个人利益。中国人总是需要遵循的规则温顺和压制自己。这种自我压抑使得美国学者认为，作为我的文化，中国文化。中国文化强调集体的全部奉献，忽略了个性，而美国文化提供了一个有限的热爱集体。
刮痧，当简给了在医院出生丹尼斯，大同没有在医院陪她，因为他在公司的会议。在中国，集体大于个性的位置，但这种选择是可以理解的的，是不可接受的，在美国社会不可原谅。而这不仅是集体主义和个人主义之间的冲突，而且在人际交往关系的看法冲突。
3.4.2家庭冲突反映在刮痧
家庭是最基本的元素和中国文化的载体。中国家庭讲家庭的爱和血缘的爱。他们认为，狗也不吃狗（虎毒不食子），所以当儿童福利局指责虐待儿童的大同，他认为这令人难以置信，而且可笑。他说，他的妻子简，“父亲爱他的儿子。这是工作的方式。为什么我要证明我的爱，弥补发言？我们正在做什么是地狱，简？它的转向倒挂。一切变成倒挂！“不过，这是美国，这是一个地方更注重事实和证据是可以接受的。孝道也是一个非常重要的美德，在中国人的家庭。在电影中，大同在于法官，他是谁做刮痧丹尼斯为了保护他的父亲，谁是真正的一到丹尼斯刮痧。他认为，如果他告诉法官，这是他的父亲不刮痧，以丹尼斯，他卖了自己的父亲，然后他将不会是一个孝顺的儿子。然而，美国人永远不会明白，在中国文化中的孝道观念。
3.4.3家庭冲突反映在刮痧
大同刮痧，要求他的朋友，以及Kunlan老板他的律师在听证会上，而Kunlan只是一种财产权律师，谁知道关于家庭法的一点。Kunlan
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