高考专题写作部分详细解析.docx

高考专题 写作部分
一、高考真题例析
2009.山东卷写作
（一）、题目：
假设你是李华，曾在美国学习半年，现已回国。你想联系你的美国老师Mr. Smith,但没有其联系方式。请根据以下要点给你的美国同学Tom 写一封信：
感谢Tom对你英语学习的帮助；
询问Mr.smith 的近况并索要其联系方式；
邀请Tom在春节期间来中国感受中国文化。
注意：1. 词数120-150；
2．可适当增加细节。
（二）、命题特点：
1、命题具有真实性和实用性，考生感到有话可说：
近几年来，又掀起了新一轮的出国热，父母纷纷把子女送往国外接受教育，这一现象是本文的基础，使主题贴近考生的实际生活。并可以引导考生思考自己身边的中国文化，做到有感而发，而不是为了写作而写作。学生在实际生活中会经常遇到这样的问题――忘记某人的联系方式，更增加了高考写作的实用性和真实性。而且这种书信的格式在平常的训练中很多，较为常见，学生对此比较熟悉和了解。
2、题目既有明确的写作内容上的限制，又具有一定的开放性，给优秀考生提供了更多的写作空间，便于发挥。
作为提纲式作文，要点提示简洁，全面。具体内容为一名学生回国后给美国同学写信邀请其来中国感受中国的文化化同时索要美国老师的联系方式，要求从
1． 感谢Tom对你英语学习的帮助；
2． 询问Mr. smith的近况并索要其联系方式；
3． 邀请Tom在春节期间来中国感受中国文化。
三个方面来写这封信。三个要点明确，但因为词数要求是120-150，所以只简单的写三个要点肯定是达不到要求的。这就给不同层次的学生一定的发挥空间，让他们有话可说，有话能说，有话说好。整体难度略低于去年书面表达。能够比较有效合理的考察考生的综合运用语言的能力。
（三）、考生答卷中存在的主要问题
1. 要点的偏离或遗漏。
今年的作文要点非常明确，已经以汉语形式给出，并且标出了1，2，3。按说不该在要点上出问题。但在主题方面还是出现了下面几种情况：1）第一个要点太短，没展开。一笔带过，一句话Thank you for your help完事。因为汉语给出的内容和后面两个是并列的，所以从篇幅上太短的话不妥。这里应该稍微展开写上几句，如：感谢你帮我学习英语，帮我适应陌生的环境，在我生病的时候照顾我等。这儿我觉得需要自己发挥一下想象力。2) 在第二个要点中，Tom和Mr.Smith两个人物关系弄混了,不知道哪个是老师，哪个是朋友了。第二个要点要求李华问候老师Mr.Smith,并且要Mr.Smith 的联系方式。有同学写着写着把两个人混成一个人了，如：“Tom, 你是我最好的老师，我好久没和你联系了，能告诉我你的联系方式吗？”这么写得不在少数。3）在第三个要点中，有的同学也邀请Tom到中国来感受中国文化，但是没有提到“春节”。春节”是个关键词，没有提这两个字，别的内容发挥得再多也没有用。也有提到“春节”，但是没有写“感受中国文化的。”
我们通常会认为只有英语程度差的同学才会犯这样的错误，其实不都是这样。有个老师对她看的一份试卷非常惋惜，这篇作文写得相当好，书写就象字贴，用了不少高级词汇，复合句也用得非常准确，简直可以算是满分卷，或者至少是优秀卷，但是该生就犯了第二个错误，一直把两个人当做一个人，没提Mr.Smith这个人。最后这个老师和组长商量的结果是最多及格，18分，最后看在他其他内容的太好的份上给了20分。
2．语法错误  
语法错误分为大错和小错，大错指的是：搭配错误、词语用错（介词、名词、动词、形容词、副词）、时态、语态、主谓一致、非谓语动词、句式等错误；小错是：单词拼写、冠词、大小写、标点符号错误。“语法结构多样，词汇丰富，显示出较强的语言运用能力，语言小错不超过四个的是优秀档次（26分上）。事实上，考生在写作中所犯的显而易见的大错占很大比例。如：
1 Thanks you for your help with my English study.
2 I’m grateful for you .
3 Now I very like English  / I am very like English.
4 How are Mr. Smith ?
5 I want to know Mr. Smith’s telephone.
7 Could I invent you to come to China in Spring Day?
8 Welcome you come China.
3．基本词汇使用错误。
感谢你对我的帮助：I thanks to you help. / Thanking for your help. /
Thanked to your help.  
他怎么样？ How about he? / Is his body healthy? / Is he good?
春节的写法： Spring Day./. Spring holiday./. Spring Autumn/ New year/ 
“文化”的词性：culture, cultural分不清哪个是名词，哪个是形容词。
史密斯老师：teacher Mr.Smith
与…取得/保持/失去联系 get/keep in touch with /lose touch with/
4. 复杂句式的错误使用
有的同学想使用复合句出彩，结果出现很多用错的情况，效果适得其反。
如虚拟语气的错误使用：Without your help, My English can’t improve so quickly.
          (正：Without your help, My English couldn’t have improved so quickly.)
定语从句： I will never forget the half year that we stayed together.
          ( 正：I will never forget the half year when we stayed together.
            I will never forget the half year that we spent together.)
象这么写，还不如全文都用简单句，如果一点儿没有错误的话，会在25分左右。
5．书写的问题。
考生的试卷是经专门技术人员扫描上网再评阅的，所以考生按要求必须使用黑色0.5毫米签字笔写在试卷的规定位置，词数要120-150 ，词数少于120或者多于150的扣2分，字迹要清晰，字体要大得足以让评卷员看清，卷面要整洁，不可大量涂抹。有好多需要3评4评的试卷是因为需费劲辨认的字体而得分悬殊大，甚至有试卷字体太小几乎无法看见，耗费评卷员太多时间。按阅卷工作的进度要求，每份试卷需大约20秒完成提交结果，字体和卷面有问题的试卷肯定影响考生的最终成绩。虽然阅卷没有提出特别的要求，但是书写还是会直接影响阅卷老师的情绪，在同样水平的情况下，卷面整洁，书写仔细的同学老师会愿意多给几分。有些同学的字写得太小，太密，行距太小的话，扫描以后让人很难辨认。还有不用黑色中性笔的，扫描出来之后，字迹模糊，不清楚。
6．抄写别的文章。
有些学生以为不会写作文，抄别的文章蒙一下。其实真是没有用处。因为是双评，两个老师都非常小心，不可能看一眼书写就给分的。许多学生比较聪明，开头结尾自己写两句，中间抄；也有的每段开头自己写一句后面抄；也有的全篇抄，中间不时出现Tom和Mr.Smith这样的词造成一种假象。
看到累了的时候老师最愿意看的有两种试卷，一种是白卷，一种是抄的，直接给零分就行了，不用动脑而且又不会出差错。
附：作文的阅卷标准
作文得分分为七档：
1、极优档：30分
书写规范，覆盖所有要点，内容充实，词汇丰富，有修辞意识。（满分作文极少）
2、优秀26—29分
紧扣主题，覆盖所有要点，内容充实，语法结构多样，词汇丰富，显示出较强的语言运用能力。语言小错不超过4个。（有高级词汇，有表达正确的复合句）
3、良好：22—25分
紧扣主题，覆盖所有要点，内容较充实，语言有少量错误，但基本不影响意思表达。
4、一般：18—21分
紧扣主题，基本覆盖所有要点，能够表达基本内容。错误已影响了部分意思的表达，但多数句子基本正确。
5、较差：13—17分
内容不完整，要点不全，行文不连贯，语言错误（尤其是大错）较多，多数句子基本正确。
6、差：6—12分
内容混乱或主要内容偏离主题，能够写出少数与内容相关的可读句。
7、极差：0—5分
只能写出与内容相关的词语，没有有效信息；抄写其他文章或只写出与作文相关的内容。
写作部分对教学的反思
二、应试技巧点拨
闪光的英语作文包含四个要素：
1、完整性：句子结构完整，意义完整；
2、连贯性：句子各部分之间以及句子之间的关系紧密、协调，前后意思连贯，思想表达清楚有序；
3、简洁性：言简意赅；
4、多样性：包括词汇多样性和句子多样性。
以上四要素中，前三个要素是前提和基础，比较容易做到；多样性是对前三个要素的升华，是作文闪光点的核心和关键所在。接下来，就请大家跟我一起来了解如何写出多姿多彩的英语！
写作应遵循的步骤：
1、仔细审题，弄清大意。仔细审题，弄清写作内容，如背景、人物、时间、体裁、词数限制等要求。
2、编写提纲，列出要点。审题之后便要根据内容列出提纲，整理出内容要点，理清要点一方面不至于信马由缰、漫无边际，另一方面也不至于遗漏内容要点。
3、紧扣要点，扩写成文。扩写时，可运用想象适度发挥，但切记不可随意乱写，要紧扣文字或图表提示，适当描述，连贯通顺，条理清晰即可。
4、反复修改，认真誊写。扩写后要认真审查，检查语义是否通顺连贯。检查时注意是否有要点遗漏，语法和拼写错误，如事态、人称、大小写和标点符号等，然后将短文抄写在试卷上。
I 分类指导训练
一、书面表达不同题材分类写作：书面表达按照题材常分为：
A. 正反观点类
B. 数据式图表类
C. 看图说话类
D. 应聘类
E. 提示议论文类
F. 应用文类
G. 表示今昔对比类写作套语类
H. 地图/路线图类
I. 介绍某人，某物，某地，某计划，某项目类
下面分别讲解：
A. 支持与反对观点陈述类（议论文）
一、写作模式
总起常用句子：
1.Different people hold different opinions.
2.Opinions are divided.
3.People have taken/adopted different attitudes towards …
4.People have different opinions on this problem.
5.People take different views on this question.
表达观点一常用句子:
1.Some of us think/ hold the view /are in favor of the idea that…
2.The reason is that….Besides, …
3.Some are against the view that….
表达观点二常用句子:
1.However/On the other hand
2.others have just the opposite opinion. They think that…What’s more,…
3.However, each coin has two sides.
本人观点常用句子：
1.As far as I am concerned, …
2.In my opinion,…; It’s my opinion that…
3.In a word,…Only through…can we have a bright future.
二、写作模式2
We had a heated discussion about/on ... Students’ views/ideas/opinions on it vary/differ from person to person. Some students say / think / believe that… However, others hold the view that…
As far as I am concerned, I am in favor of the first/second view./ I would like to ….The reasons are as follows. First, …Secondly,…
In conclusion / In a word ,…
三、写作模式3
There is a widespread concern over the issue that （作文题目）.But it is well known that the opinion concerning this hot topic varies from person to person.
A majority of people think that 观点一. In their views there are two factors contributing to this attitude as follows: in the first place,原因一.Furthermore, in the second place, 原因二. So it goes without saying that观点一.
People,　however,　differ　in　their　opinions　on　this　matter.　Some　people　hold the idea that观点二. In their point of view, on the one hand，原因一. On the other hand,原因二. Therefore, there is no doubt that观点二.　
As far as I am concerned, I firmly support the view　that观点一或二.　It　is not only because ____, but also because ____. The more__ _, the more_____.
四、实战演练：
1.当前不少文学作品被改编成电影。有人选择看电影，有人则喜欢读原著。请你以“Film or book, which do you prefer?”为题，按照下列要点写一篇英语短文：
看电影：省时、有趣、易懂
读原著：细节更多、语言优美
我的看法及理由
注意：1、词数：120-150字。 文章题目和开头已给出（不计入词数）。
2、参考词汇： original work 或 book in the original （原著）

Film or book, which do you prefer?
Some of us think that it is better to see the film than to read the book in the original.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
附：One possible Version
Some of us think that it is better to see the film than to read the book in the original. The reason is that it takes less time to understand the whole story. Besides, the film is usually more interesting than the original, and it is easier to follow.
Some others have just the opposite opinion. They think that they can get more detailed information from the original. Meanwhile, the language in the book is possibly more lively and beautiful.
As far as I am concerned, I agree with the second view. Actually I have more reasons for it.first I think I can stay at home, reading quietly in a situation of my own, and what’s more, I am able to better understand the author’s ideas. In a word, to read the original work is better than to see the film based on it.
假定你是李华。在最近的一次班会上，你班同学们就“高三学生是否需要吃补品来保持健康”展开了讨论。请根据下表提供的信息用英语写一篇短文，并谈一些你自己的看法，给某英语杂志投稿。
60%的同学认为
40%的同学认为
1．坚持锻炼，无需吃任何补品（tonics）。
1．高三阶段课业繁重，很多同学经常感到疲劳
2．过多吸收补品会增加体重，对健康不利。
2．补品可以帮助恢复精力。
3．价格比较贵。
3．没时间锻炼身体。
你的看法：
要求：1.词数：120-150 2.书面整洁美观。
________________ _____________________________________________________________________________

B.数据式图表类
图表作文的结构通常是三段式：
　　第一段分析图表中的数据变化反映出的问题或趋势，简要概述图表所揭示的信息；
　　第二段分析原因；
　　第三段提出解决问题的办法或建议。
　　写作时注意直截了当、尽快入题，适当加入自己的议论，力争做到观点明确，不要拐弯抹角，拖泥带水，使人读后一头雾水。
　　另外，同学们还应该注意以下几个小问题：文章应包括图表所示内容，但不是全部写到；叙述调查结果时要避免重复使用百分比；最重要的是要有表明自己观点的句子。书写要规范，包括大小写、标点符号等。写作之后还要注意认真检查，改正错误。
一、图表作文形式：
数字表：曲线图(line graph)
图形表：饼状图(pie chart)
条状图(bar chart)
表格类(table)
二、常见的表达用语：
上升
go up to/ climb to/ increase to/ rise to/jump to
例句：The population of this city has been increasing to 250 million.
保持没变
remain; not change
例句：The number of fires in each month remained the same.
下降
fall to; go down to; decrease; drop to; decline;
例句：In comparison with that in 1988, the percentage of peak points decreased by 30%.
句式：
1.The table shows (indicates) that a great number of people spent their holidays traveling abroad.
2.As we can see from the graph that the rate dropped slightly from 38% in 1993 to 31% in 2003.…
3.From the table we can find out that only 35% of the people have taken in physical activities.…
4.According to Chart I, the number was ten times as many as in 1995.
5. Compared with the boys, the girls show more interested in chatting.
6. It doubled the number of last year.
结束语
1.As can be seen from the chart that, only 10% of the time is taken up with sports activities.…
2.As is shown in the chart, the production last month rose so significantly…
3.As is described in the chart, the total number of visitors to the United States had nearly
doubled to 2.7 million person by 1974.
4.It is clear from the chart that as incomes increase people can afford to live more comfortably and eat well.
三、实战演练：
1.假如你叫李华，参加学校开展的“有困难向谁求助”(Whom do you turn to when in trouble?)的调查活动，调查结果如下表。请用英语给校报编辑写一封信反映相关内容。

求助对象
比例
理 由
同学、朋友
58％
年龄相仿，容易理解与交流
老师、家长
30％
有爱心、有经验，可以信任
无
12％
不愿与人交流，难以与人沟通

注意：1.内容要点全面，并表达出你的观点。为了使文章连贯，可适当增加内容。
2.词数：120-150词左右。
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
参考答案：
Dear editor,
I'm a student in Senior Three. We have made a survey--"Who do you turn to when in trouble?" Here are the results.
Most of the students will go to their classmates or friends when in trouble. They're almost of the same age, so they can talk with and understand each other easily. Some students will tell their teachers or parents about their troubles and ask for their help as the teachers and parents have rich experience and love them very much. They can be trusted by these students. Only a few students solve their problems all by themselves. They hate to talk with others and can’t get on well with others. They have few friends.
In my opinion, when in trouble we’d better ask our teachers, parents, friends or classmates for help.
2. 观察下列图表，请以“Changes in the Ownership of House”为题，为校报写一篇短文。
注意：短文应包括以下内容：
1、根据图示描述该市住房产权的变化
2、分析产生这些变化的原因
3、说明这些变化对个人和社会产生的影响
1995 2000 2005
(75:25) (60:40) (20:80)

首句已经为你写好。
词数120-150左右。
As can be seen from the chart, ownership of houses in a big city in China changed in the past ten years.______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
参考答案：
Ownership of Houses in a Big City in China
As can be seen from the chart, ownership of houses in a big city in China changed in the past ten years. In 1995, 75 percent of the houses were state-owned. Five years later, the rate of state-owned houses to private ones was 3 to 2. But from then on, the ownership of houses changed rapidly and so far 80 percent of houses have been private.
What caused the changes? There might have been two main reasons. First, from 1995 up to now, the people's living standards have been improving. Most of them can afford to buy the houses. Second, most people do not save a lot of money in the bank for their children as their ideas of parents did in the past. They want to have their own home and enjoy life.
Such changes have had a great effect on the development of society. It does good to both the citizens and the government.
C. 看图说话类文章（属记叙文类）
一、写作指导
在做看图作文时，首先要学会看图。这种图画一般在平面上通过线条、色彩、明暗等艺术手段，创造出人们可以直接感觉到的视觉形象和空间形象，来反映生活，来表达作者的某种思想倾向、某种爱憎和他们对现实的评价。学生在做这类题时，要审清题意，看懂画面所表达的意思，紧扣主题。防止因对画面的错误理解而走题。有些画面上附有提示，注意仔细参阅，正确使用。因为属于记叙文，要注意以下步骤：
1.(the beginning)要交待清楚五要素的内容，即where, when, what, who ,how，给读者一个内容完整、细节清晰的故事。
2.(the middle)事情的叙述可以按时间或空间的顺序叙述，让读者易于把握所叙述内容之间的内在联系，从而轻松理解文章主题。
3.（the ending）根据图片或图表大意进行议论。
（起到扣题或点题的作用）
二、实战演练：
1.请用“中秋节的等待”为题，用英语写一篇短文，描述下图的内容，并就此发表你的评论
记叙文的写作要素（即篇章结构）：

要求：1．文章必须包括描述和评论两部分；
2．词数为120-150。
_____________________________________________________________________________附：参考答案
Waiting on Mid-autumn Festival
It is a quarter past nine at night. The old couple have had the reunion dinner prepared for a long time. They are sitting at the table waiting for their son, daughter-in-law and their lovely grandchildren. The dishes are gradually cooling down, but they have not come yet. The grandmother stares at the door eagerly and the grandfather is making telephone calls but can not get through.
Are they too busy to come to their parents’ home to eat a dinner on Mid-autumn Festival?
It ought to be a happy day for families to get together. But like the old couple in the picture, today many old people are ignored by their children. They also need love and care. There is nothing more important than their family’s happiness for them. So every adult should try their best to spend some time with their parents and comfort their lonely heart.
2.高考是全社会关注的大事，学校和家庭表现尤为突出。家庭成员对考生从学习到生活给予无微不至的"关怀"，结果却给考生带来负面影响。根据图画所描述的内容写一篇文章,并发表自己的观点(夹叙夹议)。词数120-150。

As the College Entrance Examination is drawing near，_____________________________
附：参考答案
As the College Entrance Examination is drawing near, the situation is getting worse and worse. From the picture, we can see that Li Ming is "studying hard". There are many books for him to read and many papers for him to do. How poor he is! At the same time, all his family are also busy working for him.
Nowadays, many parents expect too much of their sons or daughters. They hope that their sons or daughters study hard in order to be admitted to an ideal college or a key university. It is for this reason that parents are strict with their children. However, they don’t realize what they have become a heavy burden or a great pressure. It is the hard work or the great pressure that changes their children that much.
So I hope parents provide a proper environment for their children. Only in this way, will they try their best and succeed at last!
D.应聘类（属说明文类）
一、写作步骤：
1.介绍消息来源
2.表明求职心愿
3.介绍个人简历，摆出求职优势
4.请求答复联系
5.表明感激之情
二、实战演练：
1. 假设你是新华大学的学生李华，得知某英文报招聘兼职记者，你有意应聘，请按下列要点给报社写一封自荐信。
1．表示感兴趣；
2．说明优势：知识面、英语水平、合作精神、相关经历；
3．希望得到回复。
注意：1．词数：120-150；
2．可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。
Dear Sir or Madam,
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