Lecture10AttractionandIntimacy社会心理学.ppt

,Click to edit Master title style,Click to edit Master text styles,Second level,Third level,Fourth level,Fifth level,#,Lecture 10 Attraction and Intimacy,Guo,Tieyuan,Outlines,What leads to friendship and attraction?,What is love?,What enables close relationship?,How do relationship end?,We are social animals,Social Rejection,Being rejected by others is a very painful experiences,The Cyberball game,The social pains from social rejection is very similar to physical pains.,Social rejection evokes a brain response similar to that triggered by physical pains.,Pain-relieving medicine(Tylenol)can reduce hurt feeling as well.,Recalling a time of social rejection can make people perceive the room temperature as being colder.,Feeling love can reduce physical pains,Determinants of Attraction,Proximity-Geographical nearness;functional distance,Physical Attractiveness,Similarity vs.Complementarity,Reciprocity-Liking those who like us,Proximity,Proximity effect People tend to become attracted to others with whom they are in close proximity.,Experiment,Randomly assigned students to seats at their first class meeting.One year later,participants reported their friendship with their classmates.,Results-Students had greater friendship with those who happened to seat next to them during the first class.,Similar findings for romantic relationship-most people marry someone from their neighborhood.,Proximity,Functional distance,i.e.,how often peoples paths cross,increase liking.,Evidence 1-Students in single sex students residence has less cross-sex friendship than those in gender integrated students residence.,Evidence 2-Experiment,Name 3 closet friends,Why does proximity lead to attraction?,Anticipation of interaction,Proximity leads to anticipation of interactions and exchange rewards,which boosts liking.,Experiment,Participants read ambiguous descriptions of two women,one of whom they expected to talk with immediately.Then they rated the two women.,Results-Participants rated the woman they expected to interact with more positively.,Why?Anticipation of interaction,liking forming a rewarding relationship,Which Tony do you like more?,Why does proximity lead to attractio,n?,Familiarity-Mere exposure effect,Tendency for novel stimuli to be liked more or rated more positively after the rater has been repeatedly exposed to them,Exposure,without awareness,leads to liking,Experiment 1,Participants were presented with meaningless words,pictures,or faces with either high or low frequency.They then reported their liking for these stimuli.,Mere exposure,Mere exposure,Experiment 2,During a semester,four confederate students attended a class for different times,i.e.,0,5,10,and 15 times.They seated in front of the class.At the end of the semester,students rated their liking to these four students.,Mere exposure,Name letter effect-people tend to like the letters appearing in their names more than other letters.,Repeated advertisement increases sales and the probability of winning an election.,We like the self image that we see often,i.e.,mirror image,than the one that we dont see often,i.e.,photo image.,Mirror image,Photo image,Physical Attractiveness,Physical attractiveness breeds liking.,Attractiveness and dating,Good looking is a predictor of how often one dates,both for man and women.,Study,Researchers matched couples randomly and let them have a dance and talk for 2.5 hours.,How likely they will see each other again.,Results-Personality,aptitude,and intelligence,social skills,etc.didnt matter.Only physical attractiveness can predict future dating,i.e.,the more attractive a woman or a man was,the more likely the man or the woman liked her or him,and wanted to date her or him again.,Gender,differences in emphasis of physical attractiveness,Men put more emphasis on their partners good looking than women does.,Physical Attractiveness and election,Looks influence voting-,Physical attractiveness breeds liking.,Research has found that competent-looking candidates are more likely to win elections.,When participants were provided with candidates photos,they can predict the election outcome with some accuracy.,The Matching phenomenon,Tendency for men and women to choose as partners those who are a“good match”in attractiveness and other traits,The physical attractiveness of husbands and wife,of dating partners,are positively correlated with each other.,Those who were most similar in physical attractiveness tend to love each other more deeply in a relationship.,Physical-attractiveness stereotype,The belief that physically attractive people possess other socially desirable traits as well.,Beautiful people are perceived as being happier,sexually warmer,more outgoing,intelligent,and successful,etc,Experiments,Teachers were showed identical information about a boy or a girl,with two type of photos:attractive or unattractive photos.,Results-The teachers rated the attractive boy or girl as being more intelligent and successful in school.,Research also show that teachers tend to treat attractive boys and girls more warmly.,Physical-attractiveness stereotype,Will cosmetic surgery(,整容手術,)improve other peoples impression on us?,Experiments,Participants rated eight women based on profile photos before and after cosmetic surgery.,Results-The women were rated as being more physically attractive,kinder,more sensitive,more sexually warmer and responsive,more likable,etc.,Who is more attractive?,Symmetrical faces,are,more attractive,Facial Symmetry,Average/Composite Faces,2 face composite,32 face composite,Average faces are more attractive,Average/Composite Faces,Real vs.Virtual Miss Germany,The virtual Miss Germany,a composite of 22“Queen of Beauty”finalists,were rated as being more attractive than the real Miss Germany.,Real,Virtual,Are mixed/biracial more beautiful,？混血兒更漂亮嗎？,Evolution and attraction,Physical attractiveness signals biologically important information,i.e.,health,youth,and fertility.,Women:Women with hourglass figures tend to have more regular menstrual cycles,and more fertile.The preference for lighter skin colors is related to providing enough vitamin D for the fetus.,Men:Physically attractive men tend to have higher quality sperm,have ability to gather foods and protect children(i.e.,strong and muscular),Think about why men with a square face is viewed as being more attractive,whereas women with a square face is viewed as being less attractive?,Social comparison and attraction,Contrast effect,After viewing super attractive person,we tend to judge others as being less attractive.,After watching TV program of sexy beautiful women,participants judged an average looking woman as being less attractive.,Viewing pornography decreases satisfaction with ones own partner.,Similarly,after watching super attractive person of the same gender,people rated themselves as less attractive.,Attractiveness of those we love,We see likable people as being more attractive,The more in love a woman,the more physical attractive she finds her partner.,The more in love people are,the less attractive they find all others of the opposite sex.,Similarity versus Complementarity,Do birds of a feather flock together?,Likeness begets liking,HK roommate friendships flourished when they share similar values,backgrounds,etc.(Lee and Bond,1996).,Subtle mimicry fosters liking.,Similarity among friends can predict how long the friendship last/survive.,Dissimilarity breeds dislike,Its difficult to like someone who has dissimilar views.,Strait men dislike gays,etc.,Reciprocity,A mutual exchange between what we give and receive.we like those whose behavior is rewarding to us or whom we associate with rewarding events,We like others Who Like Us,When participants were told someone like and admire them,or when they think someone might love them,they like that person more.,We dislike others who says negative things about us.,Students like another student who says 8 positive things about them more than one who says 7 positive things and 1 negative thing about them.,Negative comments are much more powerful because being less usual,they grabs more attention from us.,Reciprocity,Ingratiation(,阿諛奉承，討好,),such as flattery,can make others like you,ONLY if you/your flattery are perceived as sincere.,Do we like a person who likes us from the beginning more or do we like a person who initially dislike us,but change ones attitudes and gradually like us more?,In which case,do you think Ray would like Sophia more?,Ray is in a small discussion class with his roommates cousin,Sophia.After the first week of classes,Ray learns via his“pipeline”that Sophia thinks him rather shallow.As the semester progress,he learns that Sophias opinion of him is steadily rising.Gradually,she comes to view him as bright,thoughtful,and charming.,Ray is in a small discussion class with his roommates cousin,Sophia.After the first week of classes,Ray learns via his“pipeline”that Sophia thinks him very positively.As the semester progress,he learns that Sophias opinion of him remains very positive.Finally,at the end of semester,she continue to view him as bright,thoughtful,and charming.,Conclusion-Ray in the first case tends to like Sophia more.,Outlines,What leads to friendship and attraction?,What is love?,What enables close relationship?,How do relationship end?,What Is Love?,Passionate Love,Passion-sexual passion and desire,Intimacy-honesty and understanding,Commitment-devotion and sacrifice,What Is Love?,Deeply loved couples tend to have more eye contact(gazing).When talking,they nod their heads,simile naturally,and lean forward their bodies.,Gazing can evoke the love feeling,Experiments-Unacquainted participants gazed for 2 minutes at either each others hands or into each others eyes.,Results-The eye gazers reported intense attraction and affection to each other.,Theory of passionate love,Two-factor theory of emotion,Suggests that in a romantic context,arousal from any source,even painful experiences,can be steered into passion,Scary movies,roller-coaster rides,physical exercise,etc.all work.,Married couples who do exciting activities together report the best relationships.,Misattribution-Excitation Transfer,Dutton&Aron(1974),Men were approached by an attractive woman after crossing bridge,Shaky suspension bridge,Stable bridge,Asked to participate in a short study(shown picture,asked to make up story),Woman gives phone number in case participant has questions about the study,Dutton&Aron(1974),Compared to the men on stable bridge,men on the suspension bridge:,Used more sexual imagery in their stories,More likely to call the attractive female research assistant,%Calling Experimenter,0,10,20,30,40,50,60,Stable Bridge,Suspension Bridge,Culture and gender variations in love,Culture variations in love,Individualistic cultures-marriages for love,Collective cultures-arranged marriages,Gender differences in love,Although traditionally people believe females are more ready to fall in love,research shows that men tend to fall in love more quickly than women,and men also fall out of love more slowly than women.,0,10,20,30,40,50,60,Percentage,USA,Australia,England,India,Pakistan,Would you Marry Without Love?(stopped here),Macau,Companionate Love,Affection we feel for those with whom our lives are deeply intertwined,Occurs after passionate love fades,Outlines,What leads to friendship and attraction?,What is love?,What enables close relationship?,How do relationship end?,What Enables Close Relationships?,Attachment,Our need to belong is adaptive,Equity,What you and your partner get out of a relationship should be proportional to what you each put into it.,Self-Disclosure,Which of the following best describes your feelings?,1)I am somewhat uncomfortable being close to others;I find it difficult to trust them completely,difficult to allow myself to depend on them.I am nervous when anyone gets too close,and often,others want me to be more intimate than I feel comfortable being.,2)I find it relatively easy to get close to others and am comfortable depending on them and having them depend on me.I dont worry about being abandoned or about someone getting too close to me.,3)I find that others are reluctant to get as close as I would like.I often worry that my partner doesnt really love me or wont want to stay with me.I want to get very close to my partner,and this sometimes scares people away.,Attachment,Attachment styles,Secure attachment,Rooted in trust and marked by intimacy,Avoidant attachment,Avoiding closeness,Insecure attachment,Clinging,then indifferent or hostile,Equity,The condition in which the outcomes people receive from a relationship are proportional to what they contribute to it,Long-term equity,As people observe their partners being self-giving,their sense of trust grows,Perceived equity positively correlated with marriage satisfaction,Self-Disclosure,Revealing intimate aspects of oneself to others,We like people who self-disclose to us,and we tend to self-disclose to people who we like.,Disclosure reciprocity,Tendency for one persons intimacy or self-disclosure to match that of a conversational partner,Outlines,What leads to friendship and attraction?,What is love?,What enables close relationship?,How do relationship end?,How Do Relationships End?,Divorce,Rates varied widely by country,Individualistic cultures have more divorce than do communal cultures.,78%American women and 29%of Japanese women consider“keeping romance alive”as important for a good marriage.,86%American couples who were unhappily married but who stayed with the marriage,were mostly“quite”or“very happy”with their marriage 5 years later.,Divorce,Divorce is less likely to happen when the couples,Married after age 20,Both grew up in stable,two-parent homes,Dated for a long while before marriage,Are well and similarly educated,of similar age,etc.,Enjoy a stable income from a good job,Live in a small town or a farm,Didnt cohabit or become pregnant before marriage,Are religiously committed,Detachment Process,Detachment is a painful process,The closer and longer the relationship,and the fewer available alternatives,the more painful the breakup.,Detachment Process,Three ways of coping with a failing relationship,Loyalty,Perseverance,waiting for conditions to improve and hoping good old days will return.,Neglect,Ignore the partner and allow the relationship to deteriorate,Voice concerns,Take active steps to improve relationship,