高考英语读后续写动作描写之动作链.doc

高考读后续写动作描写之动作链
英语读后续写主要涉及动作描写、情感描写、对话描写以及环境描写。而在这四种描写中，动作描写占比重最大，对学生来说难度最高。
通过动作的细节描写来推动故事情节的发展，塑造人物形象性格，但不是没有针对性地对所有动作都进行描写，要选择最能刻画人物性格或者最有价值的动作来进行刻画。以下动作描写三部曲能够帮助你更好地完成动作的细节描写。
一． 精选动词，精准描述

学生在动作描写过程中常出现的一个问题是经常用通用词汇去代替具体词汇，而做不到精准描述，比如“说”，学生会用say，在对话中反复出现，读者则完全感受不到说话的语气，嗓音，声调等，解决方法就是做到精准用词，使用具体词汇去代替通用词汇。我整理了关于从头到脚的具体词汇，供学生参考。
1.关于说的动作：
嘟囔： whisper/mumble/grunt/murmur
结结巴巴地说：stutter/stumble/stammer
宣布：announce/declare
保证：promise/assure
建议：offer/propose/suggest；
问与答：ask询问/answer回答/reply回复
喊叫：cry out喊叫/call喊叫/shout大喊/scream尖叫/yell大喊/exclaim惊叫（因高兴、愤怒、痛苦、惊讶等发生的喊叫
其他的说：add补充说道= continue继续说道/retort反驳道； explain解释道/ state陈述道；/protest抗议道/sob哭诉道/agree同意地说/comfort安慰道/blurt out脱口而出/insist
2.关于eye的动作：
闪烁（某种感情色彩）：shine/sparkle/glimmer/glitter/twinkle with+excitement/joy/pride等表示感情色彩的名词
各种哭：cry/sob/weep/wail/burst into tears/burst out crying/fight back tears抑制住泪水
睁大眼睛：one’s eyes widened/ grew wide
3. 关于face/cheek的动作：
露出笑容：a smile appeared on/ spread across his face
焕发光彩：one’s face lit up/brightened/glowed
脸红：flush/burn （with embarrassment）
各种笑：smile微笑/laugh出声笑/chuckle轻声笑/giggle咯咯笑/sneer讥讽地笑/beam笑容满面/grin露齿笑
4. 关于hand的动作：
各种打：pound/thump/punch 猛击; beat连续击打；slap打耳光；tap/pat轻拍
各种抓：seize；grasp；grab; clutch; take hold of; catch hold of; hold on to
其他的动作：pull拉/掏； push推；reach 伸；drag拽；pinch捏wipe擦；rub揉；hug/embrace/hold sb in one’s arms拥抱；press按压；roll摇；pick up捡起
5. 关于body的动作：
sit 坐；lie 躺；bend/stoop 弯腰；lean against..倚靠；drop/hang/lower one’s head 低头
6.关于heart的动作：
各种心跳：beat/thump/pound/pump ( with excitement/fear)
其他动作：miss/skip a beat 漏跳了一拍； break心碎；melt融化；ache疼
7. 关于foot/knee的动作：
dash/rush冲；rise to one’s feet站起来 ; struggle to one’s feet 吃力地站起来; jump to one’s feet 跳起来; kneel down跪下; get down on one knee单膝跪地; slip 滑到；sneak/creep偷偷走；crawl 爬；wobble/limp/stagger/stumble摇摇晃晃地走
二. 添加修饰成分，做到生动描写
1. 可以添加介词短语或者副词来修饰动词。
①with+情感名词的搭配：
with delight/excitement/ pleasure/ happiness /joy/satisfaction /anger/rage/patience/fear/terror/embarrassment/pride /caution/care/patience/certainty
如：Her eyes shone with excitement.她的眼睛中闪烁着兴奋的光芒。
②with+身体部位
with its hungry red eyes/ its sharp teeth/her shaky hand/her pale lips等等
如：The ferocious wolf stared at Mac with its hungry red eyes.
此处用with its hungry red eyes来修饰动作stare，使狼凶狠的形象更加丰满。
如：She kissed Oliver with her pale lips.
此处用with her pale lips来修饰动作kiss，体现了母亲当时虚弱的状态，和对Oliver满满的爱。
③in+名词 in surprise/amazement/shock/sorrow伤心
in a high /low / sweet/loud/soft /weak voice 用..的嗓音
In a tone of surprise /curiosity /impatience /regret /command命令/sarcasm讽刺 用...的语气
如：He gazed at me in surprise.
④副词 suddenly /immediately /instantly /rapidly /firmly /slowly /angrily/happily/excitedly/
如：He carefully jumped over the broken glasses.
此处也可以把副词carefully提高句首，强调他的小心，效果更好。
高分表达：Carefully，he jumped over the broken glasses.
2. 在动作描写中也可以运用明喻、暗喻、拟人、夸张等写作手法，让你的写作更加生动传神。
①She howled long and loud like a ferocious wolf and then jumped at Buck.
此句把她比作凶残的恶狼用到了明喻的写作手法，使整句的动作描写更有力度，更有画面感。
②She went home in a flood of tears.她泪如泉涌地回家去了。
此处在动作描写中添加了in a flood of tears夸张描写，生动传神地体现她当时的情感状态。
三．分解动作，形成动作链或者动作面
学生要学会分解动作，形成一个完成的动作链，比如浙江高考读后续写Mac遇到狼上车的动作，不是简单的get in the car就可以解决的，过于笼统的描述使描写空洞乏味，学生要善于捕捉这个关键的慢镜头，并将Mac的动作按照时间轴分解为jump off the bicycle——dash into the back seat of the car——slam the door———lean against the seat, breathless饱满的动作链，那动作链或者动作面有哪些形式呢？
1. 动作链的表达可用状语从句，如when，while，as，before，after引导的时间状语从句来体现。
① When I arrived there, I walked to the door and knocked.
② As I waited at the stop, I heard a big noise.
2.动作链的表达可用并列谓语动词来体现，即A and B或者 A， B and C。
① She hailed a taxi, got into it and told the driver her destination.
② He reached deep into his pocket , pulled out a handful of change, and held it up to the farmer.
3.动作链的表达可用非谓语来体现。
⑴ A-ing，B 或者A，B-ing
① Looking up at the farmer, the boy said, “Thank you.”
② The dog awkwardly wobbled towards the others, doing its best to catch up.
⑵ A and B, C-ing 或者A，B-ing and C-ing或者A-ing， B，C-ing
①The farmer picked up the dog and knelt down, saying, “It’s yours now.”
② The students came in, talking and laughing.
③ Looking straight into my eyes, Mike stroke my hair, whispering, “You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”
⑶ Having done.., 主句
①Having left something in the cloakroom, I went inside to get it and found....
= After I had left something in the cloakroom, I went inside to get it and..
② Having thought about the situation for a while, I decided to ask Roy about the theft.
=After I had thought about the situation for a while, I decided to ask Roy about the theft.
这个句型可以和after引导的时间状语从句互换
4.动作链可以和情感，环境，心理，语言等结合，形成动作面。
①Burning with anger, he glared at me with his big frightening eyes , yelling, “You’re such an idiot.”
此处的burning with anger是情感描写，glare和yell是动作链，同时将动作和语言描写结合在了一起，形成了饱满的动作面，属于高分表达。
② As night was beginning to fall, Jane sat on the grass, staring at the vast sky, frightened and ravenous饥饿的.
此处将环境描写，动作描写以及情感描写结合在一起，形成了饱满的动作面。