高考英语二轮强化训练-第七讲-改错与写作.doc

第七讲 写作 强化训练一

写作试题：满分35分，主要考查考生书面表达能力，例如写正确句子的能力、使用精彩词
汇、短语的能力、所写文章逻辑性强的能力等。并且在有限的时间内容，快速写出好句、好文。
本课程要帮助学生掌握快速写句、写文、改错的方法。
结构
课程内容：短文改错 / 开放性作文
课程目标：把握改错方法，提高改错速度
课时：3

教学建议：
1、训练前教师可以安排学生思考高分作文的要素
写作考商
n 在写作前你是否先列提纲？
n 是否先写初稿，然后再修改、定稿？
n 写作过程中，会注意语法使用，尤其时态的使用是否正确？
n 会尽量避开生僻的词汇和没有把握的表达方法吗？
n 会用简单的语句间的连接成分，使文章结构紧凑吗？
n 是否能在高考前背诵30-40篇优秀范文吗？
2、限时训练后，教师启发学生自查问题，欣赏范文，明确问题
3、教师可以在表达方面进行重点说明，例如一词多义，短语优先，句式多样、连词使用。
4、短文改错核对答案后，教师要及时带读，巩固成果，提高语感，如果时间容许教师可当堂安排短文背诵默写，强化正确意识，学生才会对错误敏感。
5、写作限时训练后，教师要安排自查自改环节，然后再范文分析，通过范文分析反思自己写的文段。教师也可以根据学生的问题进行即兴强化训练，例如造句、翻译练习，巩固短语、连词等使用能力。
6、教师可以根据学生情况，灵活处理所提供的素材，例如短文改错的文段改为听写、短文翻译（中译英）等。

仿真训练1
（做题时间：10分钟）
短文改错
One day, while my friend and I was traveling through 1. _________
Germany, we were not very hungry but we only had a little 2. _________
money. We decided stop at a village market to buy 3.
something to eat. We choose the cheapest biscuits and 4. _________
ate it under a tree. We thought the biscuits were great. 5. _________
“Let’s got some more,” I said, “They’re cheap and they 6. _________
really taste well.” My friend could read some German, but 7. _________
I couldn’t, and I gave her the biscuit bag to find the name. 8. _________
She looked at it and started to laugh, “How are you laughing?” 9. _________
I asked. “Because they’re dog biscuits!” She said. 10. _________
解题技巧点评
短文改错通常考查以下几点：
1．一致性：时态、人称、数
2．动词用法：包括非谓语（动名词、分词、不定式）、系动词（后接形容词）、及物动词（无
需介词，直接跟宾语）或不及物动词（需加介词，再跟宾语）等。
3．上下文逻辑：肯定/否定；连词等。
One day, while my friend and I was traveling through 1. were
l and为关键词（A and B），所以谓语为复数。
Germany, we were not very hungry but we only had a little 2. not
l 考查逻辑。下文but…only a little为关键词。
money. We decided ^ stop at a village market to buy 3. to
l 考查动词用法：decide to do sth.
something to eat. We choose the cheapest biscuits and 4. chose
l 考查时态。文章描述的是过去发生的事。
ate it under a tree. We thought the biscuits were great. 5. them
l 考查代词。此处代替上文biscuits，故用复数形式。
“Let’s got some more,” I said, “They’re cheap and they 6. get
l 考查动词形式（非谓语动词/不定式）：Let’s do sth.
really taste well.” My friend could read some German, but 7. good
l taste为系动词，后接形容词作表语。well作形容词时只表示身体状况。
I couldn’t, and I gave her the biscuit bag to find the name. 8. so
l 考查连词。通过前后句逻辑解题，即I gave her…是I couldn't read German的结果。
She looked at it and started to laugh, “How are you laughing?” 9. why
l 考查疑问副词。通过前后句逻辑解题。
I asked. “Because they’re dog biscuits!” She said. 10. √
仿真训练2
（做题时间：10分钟）
短文改错
It was a chance of a lifetime to win the first 1. _________
prize on the Story Writing Show. All I had to do 2. _________
was to write a story or present it. My teachers 3. _________
have been telling me how great my writing was. 4. ________
So if they had said was true, I would have a chance 5. _________
of winning the prize. What were better, I had useful 6. _________
help. There was Uncle Chen, gentleman living 7. _________
near my house, who was a very much famous writer. 8. _________
He agreed to reading my story and gave me some 9. _________
advices on how to write like a real writer. 10. _________
解题技巧点评
1．√——a / the / one's chance of a lifetime：千载难逢的机会。
2．on改为in ：考查介词。in the show。
3．or改为and：考查连词。write和present为并列关系。
4．have改为had：考查时态。通篇文章为过去时态。此处为过去完成进行时，发生在All I had
to do之前。
5．they前加what：考查句子结构。if引导的条件状语从句主语是个句子（was 是其谓语），
且主语从句缺宾语（said的内容）。
6．were改为was：考查数的一致性。代词what谓语动词用单数。
7．Uncle … 后加a：考查冠词。living near my house的gentleman因该不止一个，故用不定
冠词。
8．去掉much：very修饰形容词；very much修饰动词。
9．reading改为read：考查动词形式（不定式）：agree to do sth.。
10．advices改为advice：advice为不可数名词。
仿真训练3
（做题时间：10分钟）
短文改错
Christie was one of my best friend at high school. 1. _________
At that time, we often spend time together. 2. _________
Thank to her help, I made great progress inn my 3. _________
study. Last year, she decided to study abroad. In 4. _________
other words, we would be separated for long time. 5. _________
Before her leaving off, I prepared a gift to show 6. _________
my best wishes to him. She said it was the beat 7. _________
gift she has ever had. From then on, we’ve 8. __
kept touch with each other through e-mails. I 9. _________
look forward to see her again in the near future. 10. _________
解题技巧点评
1．friend →friends：考查数的一致性。one of + 可数名词复数。
2．spend →spent：考查时态的一致性。文章开头和At that time都表明时间为过去。
3．Thank →Thanks：惯用法——thanks to sth. / sb. ：多亏了…。
4．√
5．for a long time：考查冠词的惯用法。
6．去掉off：leaving：名词/动名词：离开。
7．him →her：考查人称的一致性。通过上文多次出现的she或her可知Christie是个女孩。
8．has →had：考查时态的一致性。
9．kept in touch：考查固定短语。
10．see →seeing：考查非谓语动词。look forward to + 名词/动名词：盼望某事/做某事。

仿真训练4
（做题时间：10分钟）
短文改错
After five years away in my hometown, I find that 1.
the neighborhood which I used to living in has changed 2.
a lot. The Sichuan Restaurant and the older fish shop 3.
across the street from our middle school were gone. 4.
There exist now a park that has a small river running 5.
through. The factory at the comer of Friendship Street and 6.
Zhongshan Road has been moved out of the city, and sports 7.
center has been built in their place. The market at the comer of 8.
Friendship Street and Xinhua Road has been given way to 9.
a supermarket. Besides the bookstore next to our middle 10.
school is still there.
解题技巧点评
1．in →from：此句表示离开应用from；
2．living →live：used to do sth.表示过去常常做某事，而现在不在做了；

3．older →old：这里表示“老的、旧的”，不含比较级；
4．were →are：表示现在已经不在了，应是现在时态；
5．exist →exists：There be 句型中的谓语动词应与be后面的第一个主语来决定，a park为
单数，故谓语动词也用单数；
6．正确；
7．a：根据谓语是单数，此句应是：一个体育中心建成，故sports前加不定冠词；
8．their →its：指代错误，根据句意是指这个城市，应用its；
9．been：此句不应用被动结构，应用主动形式，故将been去掉；
10．Besides →But：根据句意，前、后句是转折，故将besides改为but。

仿真训练5
（做题时间：10分钟）
短文改错
Hi Susan,
I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to return to your 1. _________
bike on time yesterday. I mean to give it 2. _________
back to you before four in the afternoon，and I 3. _________
was hold up on my way back. Just before I 4. _________
turned corner of Park Street. I happened to 5. _________
see an accident. A little girl was hurt and her 6. _________
mother needed help. So I helped them going to 7. _________
the nearest hospital. I stayed here for one and 8. _________
a half hour and made sure that the girl 9. _________
were all right. I hope you can understand. 10. _________
Thank you!
Li Ling

解题技巧点评
1．去掉第二个to：考查动词用法。return当“返还”讲是及物动词，后直接跟宾语。
2．mean改为meant：考查时态。meant to do sth.：本打算做某事（但没做成
3．and改为but：考查逻辑。通过前后句可看出此处表示转折。
4．hold改为held：考查语态。be held up：
5．turned the corner：考查冠词。the corner of Park Street：…的拐角处。
6．正确；
7．going改为go：考查非谓语动词。help sb. (to) do sth.：不定式做宾补。
8．here改为there：考查逻辑。the表示the nearest hospital。
9．hour改为hours：考查数的一致性。
10．were改为was：考查主谓一致。

仿真训练6
（做题时间：10分钟）

短文改错
假如英语课上老师要求同桌之间交换修改作文，请你修改你同桌的以下作文。文中共有10处语言错误，每句中最多有两处；每处错误仅涉及一个单词的增加，删除或修改。
增加：在缺词处加一个漏字符号 (^)，并在其下面写出该加的词。
删除：把多余的词用斜线(\)划掉。
修改：在错的词下划—横线，并在该下面写出修改后的词。
注意：1．每处错误及其修改均仅限一词；
2．只允许修改10处，多者（从第11处起）不计分。
My friend Nick told me story about his experience back in the US, which was
very interested. One day he was having a yard sale and the old man living next door
come by to help. As the old man looked over the thing on the yard that were to be
sold, he stopped at a box of golden ball for Christmas trees. On the box was a card
say: “25 cents each.” “You will never sell these for that much.” he told Nick.
Convinced, Nick has brought the price up to 10 cents a piece. Without a moment’s
delay, my neighhor picked up the box but announced: “I’ll take them.”
解题技巧点评
My friend Nick told me ^ story about his experience back in the US, which was
a（考查冠词。）

very interested. One day he was having a yard sale and the old man living next door
interesting（-ed结尾的形容词表示被动或完成；-ing结尾的形容词表示主动或进行。此处说明的是which，即story/experience的性质，是interest动作的发出者，故用ing形式。）
come by to help. As the old man looked over the thing on the yard that were to be
came（考查时态的一致性。） in 或ground（考查介词与名词的搭配。）
sold, he stopped at a box of golden ball for Christmas trees. On the box was a card
balls（考查名词。因为是a box of，所以一定是复数形式。）
say: “25 cents each.” “You will never sell these for that much.” he told Nick.
saying（考查动词形式。首先要了解此处是介+名的倒装句，通过句型还原可知动词形式应该是A card was saying…on the box.）
Convinced, Nick has brought the price up to 10 cents a piece. Without a moment’s
（考查时态的一致性。） down（考查逻辑。从25降到10。）
delay, my neighhor picked up the box but announced: “I’ll take them.”
His（考查人称逻辑。） and（考查结构逻辑。）

仿真训练7
（做题时间：10分钟）
开放作文
请根据下面提示，写一篇短文。词数不少于50。
In your spoken English class, your teacher shows you the following picture. You are asked to describe the picture and explain how you understand it.

答案
In the picture, between two closely-located buildings grows a big tree. Unlike most trees, this one bends in the middle, struggling all the way up to get more sunshine. The picture reminds me of those who succeed in unfavorable conditions. Faced with difficulties, they never give up but try their best to find a way out. Life can be hard. But if we have the courage and determination, we will finally get the sunshine we want as the tree in the picture does.
解题技巧点评
开放作文的命题意图是考查考生能否比较具体地、清楚地表述自己的想法和感受的能力，鼓励考生使用细节和实例，具体说明所要表达的思想。
l 开放作文评分标准：文章是否扣题；内容是否充实、健康；思维是否活跃；逻辑是否清晰；语言是否规范；交际是否得体。
l 审图立意步骤：
一审：图片构成、整体感觉；
二审：局部与整体的关系、多角度立意；
三审：优选立意、确定主题。
l 写作步骤：1．审题/图；2．立意；3．定人称、时态。
l 考生常见问题：
1. 没有涉及图的内容；
2. 说明部分逻辑不清。议论与说明脱节；
3. 没有展开议论，内容欠丰富。

仿真训练8
（做题时间：10分钟）
开放作文
请根据下面提示，写一篇短文。词数不少于50。
In your English class, you are asked to describe the following picture and explain to your classmates how you understand it.

答案
In the picture, a boy is absorbed in fishing, while others are leaving, empty-handed. Finally his efforts pay off, and he gets one big fish. Actually, there are still more fish in the water. If those who are heading back could stay longer, they would surely get a good catch. So from the children's different behaviors, we can see that success needs a person's patience because patience plays an important role in the process of achieving goals. Stick to what we are doing, and the gain we get will be beyond imagination just like the fish left in the pool.
解题技巧点评
话题：持之以恒才能成功
审题：describe the picture --- 图片描写（三分之一篇幅）
explain how you understand it --- 对于图片的理解和自己的观点（三分之二篇幅）
人称：图片描述用第三人称；自己观点用第一人称
时态：一般现在时
图片信息：
1．池子里有很多鱼，但是表层鱼不多，而且大小不同（可以从不同的写作角度出发）
2．几个人正在离开
3．一个人坚持不走，钓到了大鱼
发散角度：恒心；毅力…
写作要点：观点鲜明、积极健康、理由充分、思维独特、有创造性
写作要领：内容充实、逻辑合理、发散得当、语言正确、句式多样、词汇丰富、行文连贯
学生文选1
From the picture, we can see there is a pool, in which many fish are swimming. On the bank, there are four teens. From the tools in their hands we can infer that they all want to catch some fish. Instead of waiting, three of them have left because they might not want to spend more time in waiting. Still, a boy kept on fishing and finally he succeeds in catching a fish.
What I want to say is that most of us are eager to succeed, while success is hard to come by. It demands many qualities. Patience is one of them. After a long way which is full of setbacks and difficulties, many people choose giving up, for they can't stand waiting anymore. In fact, if they can become more patient, they will be successful. Waiting is also a test. Become more patient and success will step to you.
学生文选2
There is a small pool, in which there are some fish. Four boys go fishing but only a boy does not give up. As the other three boys go back. The boy who does not give up gets a fish. The boy is on his knees and excited for the fish while others go home disappointedly.
I am wondering that if the three boys wait for another one minute, they may get fish, too. Sometimes if we insist, we will succeed. So we should not give up. If we are in trouble, we should believe that we can live through it. Therefore, do not give up and the fish is ours. Never give up and we will achieve our goals. Maybe this is the meaning of the picture.
第八讲 写作 强化训练二
结构
课程内容：情景作文
课程目标：把握写作方法，提高写作速度
仿真训练9
（做题时间：15分钟）
目前，随着环保意识的增强，越来越多的人们开始倡导低碳生活。请根据下面的图表以及中文提示，用英语写一篇短文，简要描述全球近五十年来气候变化，并分析其产生的主要原因、影响及解决措施。
原因
1）过多使用矿物燃料；
2）过度砍伐森林。
影响
1）海平面上升；
2）极端天气现象增加；
3）自然平衡被破坏。
措施
1）控制二氧化碳排放；
2）采用新型能源
注意：
1．短文必须包括以上图表所表现的主要内容。
2．短文单词数：100左右（开头已给出的单词不计入单词总数）。
3．参考词汇：矿物燃料fossil fuels；二氧化碳carbon dioxide；释放：release

The diagram shows the weather changes in the global climate.

Yours sincerely,
Li Hua
答案
The diagram shows the weather changes in the global climate. It tells us that the global average temperature has increased by 0.8℃ from 17℃ in 1951 to 17.8℃ in 2001. Thus, we can come to a conclusion that our earth is getting warmer and warmer.
As far as we know, the major reason for global warming is due to human activities. Firstly, the use of fossil fuels by industry releases greenhouse gases. Moreover, cutting down forests means that less carbon dioxide can be changed back into oxygen. As a consequence of global warming, the sea level is rising. And people are suffering more extreme weather of global warming, the sea level is rising. And people are suffering more extreme weather. The increase in temperature is also causing much damage to the balance of nature.
It’s high time that we should take measures to protect our earth. Not only can we control the releasing of carbon dioxide, but also we can be encouraged to use new energy, such as solar energy.
In a word, only in this way can we make our earth a better place for our human beings.
解题技巧点评
情景作文的命题意图是考查考生能否根据 所给情景（表格、图、文字等）撰写主题明确、内容完整、语言连贯的短文能力。在考查考生的书面语言水平的同时，还考查他们的想象能力和逻辑思维能力，考查他们能否清楚地表达试题要求表达的内容。
记叙文常包含三个主要部分：
l 开头段：多是背景的介绍，交代时间、地点、人物等（when, where, who）；
l 主体段：讲述故事的情节（what），可以由一个或几个段落构成；
l 结尾段：故事的结局（ending）是对全文进行归纳、总结，或思想提升。

仿真训练10
（做题时间：15分钟）
目前，一些诸如GG、MM、Xia Mi等的网络语言在青少年中极为盛行。你校学生会在同学中就对网络语言的看法进行了调查，调查结果见下面饼状图（pie chart）。请根据