Lesson1EQ：IQ.docx

7 Qualities of People with High Emotional Intelligence
EI determines how well you do at work. Do you have the traits(特质) that define it?
“If your emotional abilities aren’t in hand, if you don’t have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can’t have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far.”
At least that’s what Daniel Goleman, Ph.D., well-known writer and researcher on leadership who wrote the best-seller Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, says. Goleman has dedicated his work to finding out what makes people successful. And, his title spoiling the surprise, he says it comes down to their emotional intelligence. That’s what drives a person to excellence.
What exactly is emotional intelligence (EI)?  Psychology Today says it’s:
1. The ability to accurately identify your own emotions, as well as those of others
2. The ability to utilize emotions and apply them to tasks, like thinking and problem-solving
3. The ability to manage emotions, including controlling your own, as well as the ability to cheer up or calm down another person
The concept of emotional intelligence has been around since 1990, when Yale psychologists John D. Mayer and Peter Salovey presented the concept to the academic world. But Goleman has gone on to study it further—and he found a direct relationship between the EI of a company’s staff and the company’s success:
· Employees with a high level of EI have self-awareness that helps them understand co-workers and meet deadlines.
· When people have high EI, they are not bothered by client criticism; they remain focused on outcomes, rather than feeling offended.
· If two job candidates have similar IQs, the one with the higher EI will likely be a better fit for the company.
Like Goleman said, no amount of smarts will make up for a lack of the ever-important emotional and social abilities, especially as part of the professional world. Not sure how to recognize this essential trait? Here are seven characteristics of emotionally intelligent people.
1. They're change agents.
People with high EI aren’t afraid of change. They understand that it’s a necessary part of life—and they adapt. Emotionally intelligent people are flexible and are constantly adapting. They know that fear of change is a major threat to their success and happiness. They look for change that is just around the corner, and they form a plan of action should these changes occur. They embrace change.
2. They’re self-aware.
They know their strengths and weaknesses. They also know who pushes their buttons and the environments (both situations and people) that enable them to succeed. Having a high EI means they know their strengths and they know how to use them to their full advantage while keeping their weaknesses from holding them back.
3. They’re empathetic.
It doesn’t matter if they’re introverted or extroverted, emotionally intelligent people are curious about everyone around them. This curiosity is the product of empathy, one of the most significant gateways to a high EI. The more they care about other people and what they’re going through, the more curiosity they’re going to have about them. Being able to relate to others, makes them essential in the workplace. With an innate ability to understand what co-workers or clients are going through, they can get through difficult times drama free.
4. They’re not perfectionists.
While extremely motivated, emotionally intelligent people won’t set perfection as their target because they know that it doesn’t exist. Human beings, by our very nature, are fallible. When perfection is your goal, you’re always left with a nagging sense of failure that makes you want to give up or reduce your effort. You end up spending your time lamenting what you failed to accomplish and what you should have done differently instead of moving forward, excited about what you've achieved and what you will accomplish in the future. Emotionally intelligent people distance themselves from their mistakes, but do so without forgetting them. It takes refined self-awareness to walk this tightrope between dwelling and remembering. Dwelling too long on your mistakes makes you anxious, while forgetting about them completely makes you bound to repeat them. The key to balance lies in your ability to transform failures into nuggets(金属矿块) of improvement. This creates the tendency to get right back up every time you fall down.
5. They’re balanced.
Their self-awareness means that they naturally know the importance of and how to maintain a healthy professional-personal balance in their lives. They eat well, get plenty of sleep and have interests outside work. They limit their caffeine intake, since drinking excessive amounts of caffeine will eventually lead your emotions to overrun(超出限度) your behavior and sidestep(规避) rational thinking. They make sleep a top priority, for they know that their self-control, attention, and memory are all reduced when they don’t get enough—or the right kind—of sleep. When they sleep, their brain literally(实在地) recharges, so that they wake up alert and clearheaded.
6. They’re difficult to offend.
An inborn sense of wonder and curiosity makes them delightful to be around. They don’t judge; they explore the possibilities. They ask questions and are open to new solutions. Emotionally intelligent people are self-confident and open-minded, which creates a pretty thick skin. They may even poke fun at themselves or let other people make jokes about them because they are able to mentally draw the line between humor and degradation.
7 They’re gracious.
People with high EI know every day brings something to be thankful for—and they don’t see the world as “glass half-empty” as a lot of people do. They feel good about their lives and don’t let critics or toxic people affect that. Researches show that people who worked daily to cultivate an attitude of gratitude experienced improved mood, energy and physical well-being. They neutralize toxic people. Dealing with difficult people is frustrating and exhausting for most. When high EI individuals need to confront a toxic person, they approach the situation rationally. They identify their own emotions and don’t allow anger or frustration to fuel the chaos. They also consider the difficult person’s standpoint and are able to find solutions and common ground. They don't hold grudges(怨恨). Holding onto grudges means holding onto stress, and emotionally intelligent people know to avoid this at all costs. Letting go of a grudge not only makes them feel better but can also improve their health.
References:
l Rhett Power  August 23, 2017
7 Qualities of People with High Emotional Intelligence | SUCCESS

l Travis Bradberry March 3, 2016
18 Signs You Have High Emotional Intelligence | SUCCESS

Mind Map: Success comes with a high EQ / EI

Thought-provoking activities: -- relating to real life skills Jun.15, 2018
Get ahead with your high EI
How to improve your mindset by improving your EI?
Here are some questions to help you give it some thoughts about your EI.
l Are you afraid of changes?
l Do you embrace changes happily and are confident that you are able to adapt to new environment?
l Do you know your strengths and weaknesses and know how to utilize what you’re good at?
l Are you able to relate to people?
l Do you find it hard to understand people around?
l Are you willing to help others?
l Do you learn from your mistakes and let go instead of keeping frustrated at failure and blaming yourself for a long time?
l Do you maintain a balanced life, eating well, getting enough sleep and have interests outside work?
l Are you curious and ready to explore the possibilities and open to new solutions?
l Do you appreciate what you’ve got and don’t let toxic people affect your daily life?

Guided oral / written productive assignment:
Part 1: Indentifying your own problems / Describing a phenomenon
In reflection, I notice that… / Speaking of…, I find…. / Looking back, I find….
Part 2: Analyzing the problem / Comparing your behavior with that of those with high EI
I’ve learnt that people with high EI tend to…. In comparison, I ….
Part 3: Providing possible solutions / plans for self-improvement
In order to achieve … and make a better me, I determined to …. / I thought it won't be too hard for me to ….

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Watch your thoughts; they lead to attitudes.
Watch your attitudes; they lead to words.
Watch your words; they lead to actions.
Watch your actions; they lead to your habits.
Watch your habits; they lead to your character.
Watch your character; it determines your destiny.

Notes:
5 components of emotional intelligence (EI)
l Self-awareness
l Emotion management
l Motivation
l Empathy
l Social skills

参评标题：(与教案向匹配的课堂材料)
A Teaching Plan for L1 Success comes with a high EQ
Unit 13 People, Module 5
(高中新课标北师版必修模块5)
单位：厦门外国语学校
姓名：陈莹
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