On-Differences-of-Marriage-Customs-Between-China-and-Western-Countries--浅论中西婚俗差异.docx

本 科 生 毕 业 论 文

题 目 On Differences of Marriage Customs Between China and Western Countries
专 业 英 语 　
班 级 094
姓 名
指导教师
所在学院 外国语学院
完成时间 2013年02月18日
- 17 -
On Differences of Marriage Customs Between China and Western Countries

Abstract: Marriage is a ceremonious thing in everyone’s life. No matter in which country and religion, wedding is a festive thing. As the countries of China with a long history and the western countries with rapid development, although there are many differences in wedding culture, they all carry with love and best wishes. There are many procedures in Chinese marriage custom. Earliest wedding ceremony including six etiquettes: proposing, asking the name, asking for fortune, sending betrothal to the girl’s family, choosing the date of wedding and hold wedding ceremony. However, in western, there are normally four procedures including proposal, changing surnames, choosing the day and holding the wedding. With the progress of overall society, some institutions of marriage begin to change gradually. Thus, it is necessary to know about some foreign wedding cultures. This paper aims at making comparison between Chinese marriage and western marriage by analyzing different marriage system, religious, geographies and value orientation. By taking a new look at contemporary marriage and making comparison, we can know more about new marriage value of modern people.
Key word: Marriage; wedding; wedding culture; contemporary marriage；comparison

摘 要 婚姻在每个人的生命中都是非常隆重的事情。无论是哪个国家或宗教，婚礼是一个值得庆祝的节日。有着悠久历史的中国和快速发展中的西方国家虽然有不同的婚俗文化，但是婚礼都是充满爱和祝福的。中国的传统婚姻有许多讲究。最早的婚礼仪式有纳彩、问名、纳吉、纳征、请期、亲迎。而西方通常只有求婚、更名、挑选日子和举行婚礼这些步骤。随着整个社会的进步，婚姻制度也在悄然改变。因此，有必要了解一些外国的婚礼文化。本文旨在通过分析不同的婚姻体制、宗教信仰、地理因素和价值取向对中国婚姻和外国婚姻做一些比较。将对中国婚姻和外国婚姻在婚姻体制、宗教信仰、地理因素和价值取向方面进行分析和比较。通过比较重新审视当代婚姻现状,了解现代人们对待婚姻的价值观新的见解和认识。
关键词 婚姻; 婚礼; 婚礼文化; 现代婚姻 比较

CONTENTS
Abstract I
Contents III
1. Introduction 1
2. Chinese Wedding Custom 1
2.1 Six Etiquettes 2
2.1.1 Request For Marrying the Bride 2
2.1.2 Request for Bride and Groom’s Birth Dates 2
2.1.3 Bride Price (Betrothal Gifts) 3
2.1.4 Formal Gifts for the Bride’s Family 3
2.1.5 Arrangement of Wedding Ceremony 3
2.1.6 Wedding Ceremony 3
2.2 Three Letters 3
3. Western Wedding Culture 4
3.1 African Wedding Customs 4
3.2 Austrian Wedding Customs 5
3.3 European Wedding Customs 5
3.3.1 Russian Marriage Customs 6
3.3.2 British Wedding Customs 6
3.3.3 French Wedding Customs 6

3.3.4 German Wedding Customs 7
3.3.5 American Wedding Customs 7
4. Differences between China and the West 8
4.1 Different Marriage Media 8
4.2 Difference in Freedom Degree 9
4.3 Different Marriage Purpose 9
4.4 Different Degree of Equality 9
5. Reasons for Differences 10
5.1 Marriage System 10
5.2 Different Beliefs 11
5.3 Geographies 12
5.4 Value Orientation 12
6. Marriage Custom in Modern Times 13
7. Conclusion 14
References 15
Acknowledgements 16
1. Introduction
China is one of the four ancient countries which witnessed the splendid civilizations during the five thousand years. Since the Yellow Emperor built Huaxia, descendants of the dragon created excellent culture in their wonderful land. Western Europe and other states also have obvious characteristics of culture in the long history. From eating habits to dressing style, from festival air to education background, there are numerous differences between China and western countries in modern times. However, during these differences, marriage is the first human relation since ancient times. In China, marriage is a connection among complex social relationship and has always been taken seriously. Wedding is a kind of ceremony combines two people who fall in love with each other and is a display which can prove their faithful love. Wedding is always carrying happiness and giving us a lot of indelible memories. As China carried out reform and opening up, more and more communication and exchanges between China and foreign countries took place, which virtually affect the culture atmosphere. It is clear that different countries have different wedding ceremonies in the background of different natural environment, life style and understanding about life. Affected by those factors, marriage customs in different groups differ in various forms.

2. Chinese Wedding Custom
In old times, marriages are arranged so it’s normal for the parents to dominate the bride-seeking process. There are some circumstances where the marriage has been arranged when both the bride and the groom were very young or not even born. Such kind of marriage can even be distorted. Therefore, there have been many tragedies. Just like the Butterfly Lovers and Peacock Flying Southeast in which depicted tragic love story. After the founding of New China, the people became masters and women get liberation. As marriage is a great event in one’s whole life, it gives its full autonomy to persons who are involved in it. Free love becomes a reliable guarantee to happy marriage. The way to select mate also changes a lot in modern society, such as introduction by friends, matrimonial agency, and If You Are the One and so on.
The traditional wedding rituals undertaken by the Chinese has been practiced since the Qin Dynasty (221 – 206 BC). It’s elaborate for the groom’s family to search for an ideal bride for the family, it is particularly complex for wealthy households and yet also essential for poor households. In general, the procedure of a marriage has six etiquettes and three letters. Each of them plays a very important role in a successful marriage.
2.1 Six Etiquettes
Chinese marriage was systemized into custom in the Warring States period (402-221 B.C.). Due to the long history, there are different customs to follow in different places. Although they are generally the same, visitors still get chance to witness traditional marriages in the countryside. It was very important to follow a basic principle of Three Letters and Six Etiquette since they were essential to a marriage.
2.1.1 Request For Marrying the Bride
It is so called that men and women do not marry without matchmaker. A matchmaker is the person who tries to help people they know to form a romantic relationship or to get married. After the groom’s family has spotted a young girl whom the groom wants to marry, the family will find a matchmaker to communicate with the woman’s family. This old lady will assuage the conflict of interests and general embarrassments when discussing the possibility of marriage on the part of two families largely unknown to each other.
Both sides will deal with certain terms. If that goes successfully, both families will proceed to the next step.
2.1.2 Request for Bride and Groom’s Birth Dates
This is the second step in arranging a marriage. Upon successfully competition of the previous step, the groom’s family will request for the bride’s family Eight Letters through the spokeswoman. In Chinese calendar, there are 22 letters that we use to represent date. Ten are known as Tiangan and twelve are Dizhi. Two bottles are used to represent each of the following: year, month, day and time. Altogether, eight letters will accurately represent the bride’s birth date.
After obtaining the eight letters of the groom and potential bride, a fortune teller will be hired to determine whether the two match each other. If there is nothing wrong with the bride’s birth date, the groom’s family will proceed to the next step. Otherwise, there will be no further contact between the families and the groom’s family may look for another suitable bride.
2.1.3 Bride Price (Betrothal Gifts)
Gifts in monetary, furniture, or even estate terms are arranged for the matchmaker to present to the bride’s family, including the Gift Letter.
2.1.4 Formal Gifts for the Bride’s Family
The traditional purpose of these gifts is to show the sincerity of the two families and a promise to take good care of the bride. It is a way of showing respect and gratitude to the parents. And the differing traditional items symbolize meanings such as “wealth”, “abundance of descendants”, “sweet and loving marriage”, “a good shelter” and many more.
2.1.5 Arrangement of Wedding Ceremony
Before wedding ceremony, two families would arrange a wedding day according to Chinese tung shing. Selecting an auspicious day to assure a good future for the couple is as important as avoiding what is believed to be an unlucky day. In some cases there may be no auspicious dates and the couple will have to review their potential date range.
2.1.6 Wedding Ceremony
On the big day, both the bride and the groom’s house will be decorated in red. The groom’s family will sent out a procession of servants, musicians and a carriage which is carried by four servants to the bride’s family to bring the bride back. The bride will then be brought to the groom’s house and the two will perform the marriage ceremony witnessed by all the relatives and friends.
2.2 Three Letters
China is a traditional nation which put more emphasis on etiquette, courtesy. The marriage etiquette, with a long history in China, has rich meaning and complete system. Formal letters play an important role in marriage events.
Request letter: Request letter is a formal letter confirming the arrangement of marriage.
Gifts letter: Gifts Letter is a list which records the value of gifts sent to the bride’s family.
Wedding letter: Wedding letter is a letter presented to the bride’s family on the day of the wedding to confirm the act of bringing the bride into the groom’s family.
The Chinese wedding culture in modern and contemporary times has been undergoing constant evolvements and innovations, presenting the characteristics of a rich combination of western eastern cultures and both tradition and fashion.

3. Western Wedding Culture
Wedding customs are various, from America to Europe, from Middle Eastern to Africa. Everyone has so many sorts of restrictions in choosing a partner that it is not as romantic as traditional marriage. According to the way human beings in choosing their companions, there are snatch, free love and cross marriage, etc. Some of these points will be further elaborated.
3.1 African Wedding Customs
The wedding customs of the African nation are different because of different religions and ethnics. It is hard to find identical wedding ceremony in those wedding customs.
Long and fun-filled wedding: There are a lot of wedding programs at Sudanese traditional wedding, so that it will last ten days till the end
Religious overtones wedding: The wedding is hosted by minister in groom’s house who will read Quran to bride and groom.
Wedding without groom: Berber people who lived in Algeria can’t meet groom at a wedding. The reason is very humorous. The groom has to live separately from his parents. This situation will last three days till his parent knocks at his door and ask him to make good arrangements for family life. People will applaud for him and bless him when groom goes out of new room.
3.2 Austrian Wedding Customs
In the past the marriage proposal was a more formal procedure, the prospective groom sent his friends or members of the family to represent his interest to the prospective bride and her family. If they saw a blind man, a monk or a pregnant women or wolves these would be good omens which would bring good fortune to the marriage.
Traditionally, bride had been thought to be particularly vulnerable to evil spirits and many of the cultures associated with wedding are to be protected by local people.
And bridesmaids were dressed in a similar way to the bride. The bridesmaids act as decoys to confuse evil spirits and thus protect the birds.
Although most wedding ceremonies take place on Saturday, it is considered unlucky in the past. Friday was also considered unlucky particularly Friday the 13th. The famous old rhythm advises a wedding in the first half of the week: Monday for wealth, Tuesday for health, Wednesday for the best day of all, Thursday for losses, Friday for crosses, Saturday for no luck at all.
What’s more, in the middle Australia and the north arid region as well as the border district, there are aborigines occupying 1% of the Australia population. They don’t know much about the agriculture and the stockbreeding, living a primitive life including collecting wild plants and hunting, and keeping the ancient manners and customs, their wedding customs is more specific. For aborigines, the most important thing is to dress up with some decorations. Their dress is very simple, just cover the waist with a piece of doth, nearly naked, but their decorations are really complicated.
3.3 European Wedding Customs
One of the ancient traditions of European wedding which is still popular today is the engagement ring. Many of our most enduring western European wedding culture began in England. Also, we can see some of other countries in Europe.
3.3.1 Russian Marriage Customs
Russian wedding customs are a little similar to China. According to their traditional customs, groom’s parents or matchmaker will communicate with bride’s family. If bride’s family agrees with this marriage, the engagement is done. And after both of the families deal with it properly, they begin to make preparation for big wedding ceremony. The bride has to say goodbye to her bedroom before she attends wedding. If her relatives are dead she has to go to tombs to make leave-taking. On the wedding day, groom will meet groom with his friends and prepare two carriages, one for the new couple and one for bride’s family members.
3.3.2 British Wedding Customs
The majority families in the UK have legal marriages. And most of wedding ceremony is hosted in the church. Many of our enduring western European wedding cultures come from England. The wedding tradition including something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue has existed about hundreds of years, even though many brides and grooms no longer know the significance of the tradition.
After lovers’ feeling gets strong, they can announce to get married. The groom has to buy wedding ring which will be put on bride’s middle finger of the left hand. Bride and her wedding party always walk together to the church. A little girl leads the procession, strewing blossoms along the road, so the bride’s path of life will always be happy and laden with flowers. Usually, a party will be held after the wedding ceremony and the dinner can be simple or complex. However a big cake is indispensable which will be cut by bride for the first time.
Honeymoon is a period of harmony immediately after the wedding ceremony. Honeymoon is one of the most important contents. British pay much attention