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如何增加文章的亮点?
写作时,如果仅局限在把内容交代清楚的水准上,只选用一些普通的、直截了当的词,或一律使用简单句平铺直叙,那么写出来的文章就会像一碗白开水,呆板、单调,没有可读性。要想把一篇文章写好、写完美,使文章耐人寻味,有深度,上当次,同学们不仅要注意文章的通顺与连贯、过渡与衔接等,而且还要尝试使用高级词汇和复杂句型,以凸显文章的亮点,使文章增添文采,给读者(尤其是阅卷者)留下深刻的印象。具体说来,同学们可尝试以下方法:
1. 交叉使用长句与短句
在英语写作中,过多地使用长句或过多地使用短句都不好,正确的做法是,根据实际情况在文章中交替使用长句与短句,使文章显得错落有致,这样不仅使文章在形式上增加美感,而且使文章读起来铿锵有力。
[例] 中午我们晒着太阳吃野餐。休息一会儿后,我们唱歌的唱歌,跳舞的跳舞,还有的讲故事、下棋,大家玩得很开心。
[一般句]At noon we had a picnic lunch in the sunshine. Then we had a short rest. Then we began to play happily. We sang and danced. Some told stories. Some played chess.
[优秀句]At noon we had a picnic lunch in the sunshine. After a short rest, we had great fun singing and dancing, telling stories and playing chess.
2. 避免同一词语的重复使用
为了使文章更生动、更富表现力,同学们在写作时应尽量避免重复使用同一词语来表示同一意思,尤其是一些老生常谈的词语。如有的同学一看到“喜欢”二字,就会立刻想起like,事实上,英语中表示类似意思的词和短语很多,如love, enjoy, prefer, appreciate, be fond of, care for等。
[例] 我喜欢读书,而我的弟弟喜欢看电视。
[一般句]I like reading while my brother likes watching television.
[优秀句]I like reading while my brother enjoys watching television.
3. 适当使用短语代替单词
[例1] 他已决定长大了当老师。
[一般句]He has decided to be a teacher when he grows up.
[优秀句]He has made up his mind to be a teacher when he grows up.
[例2] 他不大喜欢音乐。
[一般句]He doesn’t like music.
[优秀句]He doesn’t care much for music.
[例3] 有时我在超级市场碰见简。
[一般句]Sometimes I met Jane in the supermarket.
[优秀句]Sometimes I came across Jane in the supermarket.
[例4] 他告诉我问题现正在讨论中。
[一般句]He told me that the question was now being discussed.
[优秀句]He told me that the question was now under discussion.
4. 恰当套用某些固定表达
[例1]他太累了,不能再往前走了。
[一般句]He was very tired. He couldn’t walk any farther.
[优秀句]He was too tired to walk any farther.
[例2]这电影很有趣,学生和老师都很喜欢。
[一般句]The film was very interesting. Both the teachers and the students liked it.
[优秀句]The film was so interesting that both the teachers and the students liked it.
[例3]你的儿子已经长大,现在可以自己照顾自己了。
[一般句]Your son is old. He can look after himself now.
[优秀句]Your son is old enough to look after himself now.
5. 灵活改变句子开头
在通常情况下,英语句子的排列方式为“主语+谓语+宾语”,即主语位于句子开头。但若根据情况适当改变句子的开头方式,比如使用倒装语序或以状语开头等,就会增强文章的表现力。
[例1]只有这样你才能把它做好。
[一般句]You can do it well only in this way.
[优秀句]Only in this way can you do it well.
[例2]门开了,史密斯先生走了进来。
[一般句]The door opened and Mr. Smith came in.
[优秀句]The door opened and in came Mr. Smith.
[例3]在小山顶上有一座古庙。
[一般句]There stands an old temple at the top of the hill.
[优秀句] At the top of the hill there stands an old temple.
[例4]窗户边坐着一个年轻妇女。
[一般句]A young woman sat by the window.
[优秀句]By the window sat a young woman.
6. 合理使用省略句
合理恰当地使用省略句,不仅可以使文章精练、简洁,而且会使文章更具文采和可读性。如:
[例1] 他可能很忙,要是这样,我以后再来拜访。要是不忙,我现在可以见他吗?
[一般句]He may be busy. If he’s busy, I’ll call later. If he is not busy, can I see him now?
[优秀句]He may be busy. If so, I’ll call later. If not, can I see him now?
[例2] 如果天气好,我们就去,如果天气不好,我们就不去了。
[一般句]If the weather is fine, we’ll go. If it is not fine, we’ll not go.
[优秀句]If the weather is fine, we’ll go. If not, not.
[例3] 她本可申请那份工作的,但她没有。
[一般句]She could have applied for that job. But she didn’t do so.
[优秀句]She could have applied for that job, but she didn’t.
7. 适当运用非谓语结构
非谓语结构通常被认为是一种高级结构,适当运用非谓语结构,会给人一种熟练驾驭语言的印象。
[例1]听到这个消息他们都高兴得跳了起来。
[一般句]When they heard the news, they all jumped for joy.
[优秀句]Hearing the news, they all jumped for joy.
[例2]由于不知道她的地址,我没法和她联系。
[一般句]As I didn’t know her address, I wasn’t able to get in touch with her.
[优秀句]Not knowing her address, I wasn’t able to get in touch with her.
[例3]他出生农民家庭,所以只上过两年学。
[一般句]As he was born into a peasant family, he had only two years of schooling.
[优秀句]Born into a peasant family, he had only two years of schooling.
8. 注意文章的过渡与衔接
书面表达的评分标准是把衔接和连贯作为核心标准来要求的。之所以如此强调衔接和连贯,是因为这是构成语篇的最基本的条件。语句间的连接成分是衡量衔接与连贯很重要的标准之一。构成语篇连接成分的过渡词语,被称为“篇章纽带”,其语篇衔接作用是不言而喻的,学生要学会正确恰当地使用这些表示逻辑关系的关联词语,使文章前后连贯,结构紧凑,过渡自然。表示过渡与衔接的常用表达有:
⑴表示顺序的:first, then, finally, in the end 等。
⑵表示转折的:but, however, meanwhile, at the same time, instead, on the contrary, unfortunately, after all等。
⑶表示并列的:both…and, as well as, neither…nor, either…or, some…some…等。
⑷表示递进的:besides, even, moreover, what’s more, furthermore等。
⑸表示时间的:now, then, in the past, at present, in the future等。
⑹表示对比的:while, on one hand, on the other hand, in the same way, just as等。
⑺表示因果的:because, as, now that, so, therefore等。
⑻表示程度的:first of all, above all, again and again等。
⑼表示强调的:indeed, surely, certainly, of course, above all等。
⑽表示列举的:for example, such as, for instance等。
⑾表示总结的:in a word, in short, in brief, in all, in conclusion等。
9. 合理安排句型
注意把意思相近、相似、互为补充的句子合为一个复杂句,使重点突出,并且要明确内在的逻辑关系。
When it is my birthday, my mother will cook some dishes to celebrate my birth, or she will give me some money to buy whatever I want.
改为:To celebrate my birthday, my mother always cooks some dishes or gives me some money to by whatever I want.
改后的句子由两句变为一句,句义更易理解,逻辑更清楚。
注意中文和英文两种语言结构上的差别。
①英文常用被动语态,而中文常用主动语态。
The problem will be discussed tomorrow. 明天讨论这个问题。
②中文中主语多为人称代词,而英语中,人称代词、名词、动名词短语、不定式、从句等都能作主语。
It’s important to learn English well.
Where and when the meeting will be held has not been decided.
We aim at quality rather than quantity.
Teaching the children is the thing I like best.
10. 综合使用各类所谓的“高级”结构
[例1] 现在人人都知道这消息了,我想一定是吉姆把它泄露出去的。
[一般句]Now everyone knows the news. I think Jim must have let it out.
[优秀句]Now everyone knows the news. I think it must have been Jim who has let it out.
[例2] 我们所能做的只能是站在那儿,设法抓住违章者。
[一般句]We had to stand there to catch the offender.
[优秀句]What we had to do was (to) stand there, trying to catch the offender.
[例3] 如果她的发音不比她老师好的话,至少也不会比她老师的差。
[一般句]If her pronunciation is not better than her teacher’s, it is at least as good as her teacher’s.
[优秀句]Her pronunciation is as good as, if not better than, her teacher’s.
11. 大胆使用高级词汇
新出台的书面表达评分标准鼓励考生“尽量使用较复杂或较高级词汇”并对由此产生的错误采取了宽容的态度。这样一来,不仅老师要求学生在力所能及的情况下尝试使用高级词汇,而且学生也很乐意通过几个高级词汇来显示自己的水平和提高自己书面表达的档次。那么,什么才叫高级词汇呢? 其实,这是一个并未严格界定且概念十分模糊的提法,主要指以下几种情况:
⑴大纲外的常用词汇
英语考试大纲中没有却又在阅读时经常碰上的词汇,可视作高级词汇。
Her dark eyes are very attractive. 她的黑眼睛很迷人。(用attractive可视为比用beautiful高级)
Is the manager available? 经理在不在?(用available可视为比用in高级)
I happened upon her in the street the other day. 几天前,我在街上碰巧遇见了她。(用the other day 可视作比用a few days ago高级)
⑵纲内词汇的纲外用法
有些词汇虽在参考之内,但其用法是中学英语教材中不曾有或较少见的,若运用得当,可视为高级词汇。
Hearing the news, I felt kind of discouraged. 听到这个消息,我感到有点泄气。(kind of在此用作副词,意为“有点”)
⑶低级词汇的高级用法
有的简单词汇由于结合使用了较新颖的表达形式,或在特定的语言环境下运用得恰倒好处,也可视为高级用法。
He stood before his teacher silently, with his head down. 他低着头,一言不发地站在老师面前。(with复合结构用得好)
The cat jumped over the short wall, up the stairs and then into a hole in the corner. 猫跳过矮墙,爬上楼梯,然后钻进了角落里的一个洞。(介词over, up, into等用得较好)
12. 适当使用名言警句点缀
在写作时根据实际情况恰当地用上一两句名言警句来点缀文章,不仅使文章显得有深度、有智慧,而且会让文章在评分中上一个得分档次。
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