教育专业毕业自荐信范文.doc

教育专业毕业自荐信范文

>　　本文信息点齐全，层次比拟明晰，语言比拟通畅，句式也有一定的变化。作者首先用一个so…that 句式将教师随和、仁慈的特点勾勒出来，接下来回忆了教师是如何在本人当初因厌恶背单词而想放弃学英语时对本人无私的协助。结尾处，关于教师的感激和祝愿也就水到渠成，感情真诚、自然。

　　因而，文章的连接和语言优化方面也仍然能够进一步改良的。

　　【总分值范文】

　　dear miss wang,

　　i’m glad to write to you. at this moment, words can no longer express my feelings.

　　how kind and responsible can a teacher be? you just gave me the perfect answer. i can clearly remember how much i hated learning new english words at first. to be honest, i really wanted to give up. as soon as you noticed this, you offered to help me by telling me some shortcuts to learn them. you never failed to encourage me even when i made only a little progress. little by little, my interest in english grew and now i’m a top student in english.

　　i want to say thanks to you. i will work harder in the future to live up to your expectations. i hope you can be happy and healthy forever.

　　yours

　　xiaoming

　　点评：

　　这篇修正后的作文不管在语言表达以及文章内涵方面都是相当优秀的。

　　首先，开头at this moment, words can no longer express my feelings. 短短的一句话便把作者如今的激动和对教师的感激之情表达得特别充分。第二段首句的设征询句how kind and responsible can a teacher be? 更是精彩。在描写本人起初对英语单词的厌烦时，作者用了一个how 所引导的宾语从句替代原文的一般句式。

　　文章的几个过渡语也是恰到好处: to be honest, little by little等，均在一定程度上加强了文章的连接性。此外，几个表达法也相当地道、出彩，比方用 live up to one’s expectations (不辜负某人的期望)表示本人的决心，使得整篇文章的感情更加饱满、真诚，给人留下了深化的印象。